D.C. Lottery to launch online gambling website

Worried about being an unsuccessful gambler due to inexperience? iGaming, a website to be launched by D.C. Lottery, offers a (temporary) solution.

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This is not what online gambling looks like, but it will have to do.

Two wager-free games will be available at the end of July, allowing players to familiarize themselves with the site. Then, in September, you can begin collecting real cold hard cash — or, more likely, throw away those hard-earned paychecks on blackjack, poker, bingo, and the like.

But who said losing can’t be fun? And if you don't like losing, well, the Washington Times reports that "the lottery is still hammering out ways to prevent collusion among players — for example a pair of players who divulge their Texas hold’em hands over the phone without the knowledge of a third man at the online table."

A hearing is set for Wednesday to "explore how the games will work and why no one else in the country has introduced state-sanctioned gambling on the Internet." (There must be a reason, no? We just can't think of one right now. Except maybe that states don't want a broke citizenry of online gambling zombies.)

iGaming will have a minimum age requirement of 19 years old, thus shutting out high school students. So while some players may not be old enough to crack a beer, at least they can light a cigar while putting their student loans on the line.

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