Our male readers have likely heard a female friend complain that it's impossible to find a good, single man in this town — you know, that they're all gay or married. It's also likely that you rolled your eyes and pointed to this article. But your friend might be right: Here in Washington, men tie the knot at a higher rate than women. Why? Because men "need" to be married, otherwise they drink and drive and generally can't take care of themselves.

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Nationally, 35 percent of men have never been married. That's roughly the case in Virginia and Maryland, too, but in D.C. the rate jumps to 57 percent. About 29 percent of women, nationally, have never been married. Again, Virginia and Maryland roughly match that rate, while in D.C. it's 55 percent.

Ron Haskins, a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, has a perfectly logical explanation for this disparity between the sexes: Men "need" to be married, he tells the Examiner.

"[Single men] go out and drink and then they drive; they're much more likely to get into fights," he said. "They also don't eat as well.... There's a whole series of lifestyle choices that are much worse for men who are single than men who are married."

There you have it, folks. Some hard truths from a Brookings expert. Married men are responsible, law-abiding citizens, and bachelors are just a bunch of lousy drunks who survive on pizza.

You don't suppose Haskins is married, do you?