Advice on coffee etiquette, aromatic genitalia, and snoops.

Truncating the week's advice columns:

We are all savages inside. [Dear Sugar]

Penetration of any sort is uncomfortable. If you're having trouble committing to your boyfriend sexually, a new relationship probably isn't the answer. [Miss Information]

Assess your readiness for a permanent relationship before procreating. Forgo the dress and reception and invest in short-term counseling instead. After mistakenly e-mailing an off-color joke to the committee of an award for which you have recently been nominated, send a follow-up e-mail explaining your idiocy. If your friend tells you that he uses his ex-girlfriend's password to check up on her Facebook activity, inform him that you are planning to inform her of the security breach, and then do so. If you spent two months saving up for a personally engraved watch to present to your husband on your tenth anniversary, and he gave you a $50 gift card, maybe you shouldn't spend so much on your husband. If you don't want to make your friend your matron of honor because she weighs 400 pounds, you're terrible. Allow your husband to forgo the wedding ring, particularly while working construction. If the man you are not attracted to is not attractive, you must quickly decide just how shallow you are. Detail your coworker's mistakes and present them to your boss as a possible sign of early-onset dementia. Advise your cop husband to confront other parents who joke that he will use his firearm to shoot children. The world is full of strangers who are being cheated on. [Dear Prudence]

If your coworker brews nauseating flavored coffee each morning, purchase some syrups for her and suggest that she add the revolting flavoring after the coffee is brewed. There is no rule stating that sisters must be bridesmaids. [Ask Amy]

Sugar has an indefinite shelf life. [Hints from Heloise]

Go on the date with the potentially shady straight guy who's into trans women to find out if he's truly creepy or he simply fumbled his pick-up line when he suddenly came across a chick he was into. The people you invite to stick their nose in your genital area are allowed to form opinions about how you smell down there and share them with you. It is unlikely that a washcloth would have solved the problem. Dump the boyfriend who is a threatening, insecure, controlling, irrational asshole about your fetish. [Savage Love]