Good morning!

The New York Times writes about theater that makes us feel bad about ourselves. Not because it's violent or overly sexual or anything to make us squeamish — just because it's so profoundly depressing. Apparently this is a summer phenomena.

Hey, TV makes us feel bad about ourselves, too! Like this announcement that Snooki and JWOWW and Pauly D of Jersey Shore are getting their own shows.

TV that will never make us feel bad about ourselves again: The Real Housewives of D.C. Bye, Salahis! Don't let the door hit you on the way out!

D.C.: Our cups runneth over with craft beers.

Glee is going to do Gaga again. Meat suits this time?

How does someone write an unfunny article about a comedian? We Love DC profiles Allyson Jaffe.

Grammys: Girls vs. boys at the Atlantic. They've matched up the winners of both male and female vocal categories so we can decide who should have won: In 2003, Best Female Pop Vocal Performance went to Norah Jones for “Don’t Know Why” vs. Best Male Pop Vocal Performance to John Mayer for “Your Body Is a Wonderland.” But lets not quibble, since most people think the Grammys suck anyway.

Why, exactly, is the Washington Post having squirrel week?

Eliza Dushku, David Arquette: People I probably won't recognize at my annual White House Correspondent's Dinner Salahi-style party crash.

FRIDAY, FRIDAY, GOTTA UPDATE YOU ABOUT FRIDAY: Rebecca warns world of upcoming "SMASHIN" beats, and we quake in fear. She has been nominated for an O music award, which I am surprised to learn has nothing to do with Oprah, who is probably already suing them. Rebecca Black is sinking lower and lower into obscurity on the charts. Happy Friday!