Sounds to me like you did the right thing. Until recently, many companies prohibited romances between employees, especially between supervisors and those they supervise. But lately those prohibitions have softened a bit based on the realization that people tend to fall in love with those they see frequently. Who do you see frequently? Coworkers. So office romances are inevitable. According to a recent article in the NY Times, the new approach is to insist that people who fall in love at work notify HR, especially in supervisor-subordinate situations. You've done that. I hope you get that transfer.

Michael, thanks for the feedback. I'm waiting until Monday to hear back from HR (it's going to be a LONG weekend). What I didn't mention was that I asked for was not only that I get transferred, but my staff and my entire program as well. It's fairly common in our business, as program directors are subject-matter experts in their programs. I'm going to check out that NYT article. The word that keeps coming back to me is 'transparency'. The work world is not what it was even 10 years ago. It's expected I think that people be much more honest and transparent in their work with each other. So, thanks, and I hope I get both my work needs and emotional needs met. Another point: as most of us are over 40, I think we cut our teeth in the crazy 80s when everyone was making scores of money and it was truly cutthroat. I notice such a cultural shift among my 20 something staff. They have much higher expectations about the workplace meeting THEIR needs instead primarily the business needs. Is it just me, or are folks becoming more demanding of employers?

What happened? You haven't posted since you were waiting to hear from HR. Are you okay?

Hey Robin, thanks for asking! I eventually told my supervisor I was in love with him, and I felt that love was more important than a job etc. I had resigned to HR, then (UGH) rescinded my resignation. The agency was good about the process with me; giving me the space to make my decision. Felt foolish, but I decided to tough it out rather than run away. We have a tenative working relationship at this point - in my supervision with him we last week discussed the 'in love' issue that I have, awkwardly, then talked business. I believe I made the right decision by staying. He hasn't said much regarding how he feels, and I haven't asked. I'm still clueless when it comes to my heart, but the angst/anxiety has passed. I lost almost 20 lbs in 6 weeks; couldn't eat etc. I told him that I don't want to discount my feelings and am trying to cope with the ambiguity/dichotomy of loving someone that I'm not 'with'. He's been really gentle about it, which somehow makes it a little harder - I sort of wish he'd flat out say he has no feelings one way or the other - I'm trying not to press him. Blah - but it certainly keeps life interesting!