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"She asked had I ever looked at life through my mother's eyes"

I think our mothers never meant to intentionally harm our psyches. In my own mother's case, she was doing the best she could at the time, in her situation and her frame of mind.

My mother was always very ill. I always thought it was her passive-aggressive way of controlling us all. Because she was always sick, I have vowed to always be as strong and healthy as I could. I refuse to be sick. I say NO.

Because my parents were not in the slightest bit demonstrative I make an extra effort to tell and show my kids I love them. Because my mother and I were never really close, I make an effort to connect with my children.

The challenge for me has been to deeply connect with her now. I can only go as far as she will let me. I think that if we were not related, we would not be friends.

My mother did connect well with people outside the family. I used to be jealous of it. Now I admire that quality. She has a lot of good qualities and she continues to do the best she can.

I don't know the point of my rambling here. I hope it helps someone.

It does help someone. Believe me.

Hi Bella, thanks for your comments, they help me to feel not so alone. Hearing how others have similar experiences is comforting.

deerest Pamela,

Your courage in finally telling the seceret

that yuo have carryied since you wer a child

is stuning.

The healing has begun sweet child,strong

woman.

Yuo are no longer alone,my friend,we are here. love,

suzan