Online Dating: Examples of Good and Bad Profiles
Trish McDermott
Posted: Aug 13, 07 4:27pm Your online profile is the first impression others will have of you, and just like in the off-line world, you tend to make a first impression--good or not so good--in a matter of seconds. You can learn a lot from others. Take a look at some of these examples: Not-So-Good: What do i say i have had my profile on this dating game for about eight mo. Have not had much luck maybe i am doing something roung I still love to have fun I still have alot of life left in me So come on girls whats the mater I love eating out going dancing going camping I still love houlding hands I do love car raceing I am divorced now I am not a fat boy I weigh around 228 to 230 I am not a world wide travled I have been around I am looking for a good fun loving woman who does not want to lay on the beach, s That do, es not need 50 or a 100.000 to have a loving relataionship I am a very truthfull man Loyal I love my family... What Went Wrong: Good: I'm a personable, eclectic guy who embraces situations to the fullest! Life is very short, except when you are waiting at the DMV, so I try to glean all the joy out of each day. I am very open-minded and non-judgmental. I enjoy everything cultural and most outdoor activities. I will play any sport but don't really watch any. I just figure there is some terrible cosmic practical-joke being played on me if I sit there sedentary while I watch other people run around. Now I know that doesn't apply to chess, but who made it a sport anyways? (I actually think the people who control bowling pushed for chess to be a sport so they would not be at the very bottom of the physically-taxing sport list). Things that make me teary-eyed: Dumbo's mother picking him up; Writing the check for my taxes; Drinking my last bottle of a great wine; The ending of Six Feet Under; Clair de lune. Really spicy Korean-food... Why it's Good: More Good Stuff: "Thoughtful men who are engaged with the world make me happy, and ultimately I'd like to settle down with one fellow, who enjoys spontaneous outings, a wry sense of humor, and maintains a positive outlook despite the insanity and inanity of our fantastic world?" "The right woman would understand and appreciate the artist in me as well as the technician, just as I would understand and appreciate all the potentially contradictory aspects of her. She is honest and unaffected in the way she deals with the world. She treats waiters with respect. She cares about her body and takes care of herself accordingly. Her natural beauty does not require makeup, but she wears it from time to time anyway." To learn more about how to write an effective profile, check out our Online Dating Camp. Post some examples of good and bad profiles that you find. But please be sure to remove the identity of the person's profile. This is about learning--we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Have Something to Say? | ADVERTISEMENT  |
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Posted: Aug 16, 07 11:22am
OK, Trish, I haven't been doing online dating in a while so this was fun. Here are two from Match.com, both guys in their 50s, the first would intrigue me if I were looking (although he posted 6 photos with his profile, which I find scary, he IS a photographer so that is more understandable).
Good (although the 3rd person is a little weird):
Over a career spanning thirty years, this [city removed for privacy] has been making a living as a photographer. At the beginning of 2007, he decided to take a year off from daily work to organize, and digitize his photographic archives (over 2000 negatives). Along the way he made some discoveries- from a lost roll of JIMI HENDRIX to THE SEX PISTOLS' last concert at Winterland in San Francisco- did some tidying-up, and, at 56, finally had a chance to contemplate the BIG PICTURE. Here he talks about fear of failure, his current state of mind, and the quality he most admires in women.
THE INFAMOUS "PROUST QUESTIONNAIRE"
WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF PERFECT HAPPINESS?
The feeling that you're fulfilling your potential. And staying healthy!
WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST FEAR?
Regrets. Specifically, when it's all over I don't want to regret anything.
WHICH LIVING PERSON DO YOU MOST ADMIRE?
Muhammad Ali
WHAT IS THE TRAIT YOU MOST DEPLORE IN YOURSELF?
Letting fear keep me from taking even more risks!
WHAT IS THE TRAIT YOU MOST DEPLORE IN OTHERS?
Rudeness.
WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST EXTRAVAGANCE?
5 star hotels.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE JOURNEY?
It's the internal one. It only took me 30 years to discover how to get there!
WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST REGRET?
Maybe not the greatest regret but I once saw Steve McQueen just standing alone on a street corner. It's the only time I've ever frozen as a photographer. Respect to the coolest guy ever.
WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER THE MOST OVER RATED VIRTUE?
Philanthropy. Rich people have many ways to ease their guilt.
ON WHAT OCCASION DO YOU LIE?
Do white lies count?
WHAT DO YOU MOST DISLIKE ABOUT YOUR APPEARANCE?
My thinning hair...but I'm warming to the silver color.
WHICH TALENT WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO HAVE?
To be able to sit down at a piano anytime, anywhere and just slay whoever is listening. Oscar Peterson did that to me once.
WHO IS THE GREATEST LOVE OF YOUR LIFE?
My mom. Anyone who has come into contact with her has been affected by her enthusiasm and generosity. I feel lucky to have had contact with that.
WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT STATE OF MIND?
Hopeful urgency.
WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT?
Honestly, it's the pride I feel in raising two great kids.
IF YOU WERE TO CHOOSE WHAT TO COME BACK AS, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Um...how about Warren Beatty?
WHAT IS YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION?
Thanks for reminding me. I'm going to sell it and rely less on possessions for happiness or fulfillment.
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO DIE?
With a killer eulogy.
Not So Good (I cannot tell anything about his personality from this writeup and the tux/jeans line is tired):
About my life and what I'm looking for
Passionate and adventurous. I love to travel, have visited almost as many countries as my age, and have had great experiences. I am a native New Yorker who adores San Francisco, although I need a New York or London culture "fix" from time to time. I love great literature, theater, fine art and film. Hiking in the wilderness for a week at a time makes me inexpressibly happy and I meditate and work out almost every day. I walked away from a job as a NYC corporate lawyer to do human rights work after concluding I want to improve the world. I seek personal and spiritual growth, am kind, generous and a great listener, communicate well, have a good sense of humor, don't take myself too seriously, look great in my tux and suits but prefer jeans. I have had long-term relationships with women I could have married, but it never felt right. I now feel I know myself well enough to commit to a passionate and complete relationship with the right woman. I have been in love and value intimacy, and will not settle for less.
Posted: Aug 18, 07 8:46am
I agree....first guy is really interesting and we get his quirks, differences and just the Zen of him by reading what he writes. The third-person thing actually freaks me out though....I'm not sure I would have gotten to the Q&A, which was really informative, because of his use of the third person.
You are so right about guy number two. Sometimes you read a profile and you swear it sounds like ten other profiles you just read. This is a real challenge in online dating--to find a voice and a style and story that really stands out, while also saying important things about you.
Posted: Sep 10, 07 12:16am
I always find it amusing "catching" people perusing the Personals and have them tell me "oh, I'm just looking at who would dare place an online ad", or something like that. They poke fun at a few, and tell me who's cute, but I know two things about people: they are voyeurs (even if they deny it) and are always looking for an upgrade in their love life. Well actually not, some people "are" content with what they have. For now.
For me, I've posted an ad or more, and I've gotten some dates, and I met my ex-fiance' throughout the net as the Internet Sales Manager for a car dealership. She was looking for an SUV, she got a whole lot more!
However, the popular sites seem just too expensive. I rarely visit them now, but the temptation by my voyeuristic side compels me once in a while to look.
I've always felt the ads are too subjective, and people not as honest as they portray. If they can invent a "vibe" receiver and transmitter, incorporate it into your PC (or mac) and the website, someone will have a real winning dating site. Aside from that, to me they are a "cyber meat market"; but it's sort of sad we can't find someone close to our homes or don't have enough courage to ask someone out.
Online you write a story or sell yourself, hoping someone will buy it. Once you meet, that's where the rubber hits the road, and where the shimmies and shakes all come out! Life's about chances and risks, so you have to make it happen. I've been single for 2 years, so maybe another ad is in my future, but I'm hoping I'll meet someone within the next year naturally.
As businesses, online dating websites are wildly successful. I know that Match.com was originally bought by Gary Kremen for $2,500 as a new domain registration. Then he sold it a few years later for $8 million, only to be resold the next year for $50 million. Then sold again for hundreds of millions. Now it's worth over a billion dollars!
Why didn't I think of that!
Posted: Oct 13, 07 7:35pm
Useful information. I will add your source in my blog at seniorwoo.com. Thanks. Please keep refreshing.
Posted: Nov 28, 07 11:21am
After reading your posts a light bulb just went off.
I'm a advertising and marketing director thinking that there could be a new business in writing Match.com (and similar) ads for struggling singles.
We do it for resumes,
We do it for everything else from soap to peanuts.
Why not people (singles).
If I see anyone else stealing this idea i will come after you.
Of course for the few that read this and need help--you can message me for a free critique
Posted: Dec 2, 07 6:05pm
I've seen that business in Seattle already.
Posted: Dec 7, 07 12:16pm
I stand corrected
As someone greater than me once said:
"there are no new ideas"
Posted: Dec 7, 07 10:31pm
Let me know when you will be taking orders