My deepest sympathies to you.

There are some nice people around here. Maybe visitng TBD can be a distraction, to some extent, or an opportunity for you to visit with others.

I am sorry for your loss. You have come to the right place, because there are many people here who have lost their spouses early in life.

I hope the fact that you love to help people and that you work in a helping profession will help heal your grief and lonliness.

My heart truly goes out to you. May I recommend a couple of books? Good Grief by Granger Westberg and When Your Spouse Dies by Mildred Tengbom. These are both very short but powerful and helpful books. Anyway, you have come to the right place. There are many wonderful and caring people here, and there are bound to be some who share your experience whereas my experience is only that of a bookseller. But one thing I can do, and certainly will do, is to keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

It is healthy to grieve. You will always miss him but as time passes, you will develop interests to fill some of the space in your life he occupied. Just move forward while you are grieving and don't allow it to paralyze you. Talk to people who knew both of you so they will know what you are feeling and who you are feeling it about.

Coming here was a good idea. People here have been through the same experience and they won't try to sweet-talk you out of having feelings.

Work occupies time and energy so that is a healthy way to center part of your new life. Frieds are important becasue you need friends for the future.

Yes, your life will be different but it is still your life. You will have new routines and have time and space that has to be filled. Never try to replace him. He is your love and your life from when you met him to now.

If, someday you meet a new man, it is just that - new. No one replaces your husband. It is just that you are in a new stage of life and have to create what you need to fill it. He will always be a huge part of your ememories of your life but his presence no longer takes time or attention. he is memories and thinks you shared which cannot be replaced. You simply life the life you have and fill it with whatever and whoever pleases you. It is not a substitute. It is simply a new stage of living.

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in September of 2006, and I recognize so much of what you've written. We do have a widowed group here on TBD, and you might find a great deal of insight and support with us.

My heart goes out to you. My husband, the love of my life, passed away 15 months ago, very unexpectedly. I still miss him every single day. It is easier now, but the overwhelming feeling of being alone has not gone away. The first year was almost unbearable, most of the time.

I would suggest you read "When your soul aches" by Lois Mowday Rabey. It is a book for women who have lost their husband. I cried through most of it, but it helped so much, and helped me realize the stuff I was feeling was normal...

I would also suggest you spend time with friends, and get involved in church activities. It really helps. I know what the "footprints" poem is all about now. I know because I have experienced it. The Lord carried me many times in the past 15 months, when I could not walk on my own.

God bless you, brokenhearted. Know that you are NOT alone in this lonely journey. There are many women (and men) just like us. You will be in my thoughts and prayers...

I was in your shoes 26 years ago and did not believe I would live 26 days so I know your pain. I wrote down my feelings and before long I was writing poetry.

True Love Will Never Die

True love will never die it lasts forever more

It joins our hearts together and teaches us to endure

It helps us deal with life's problems

In a constructive way

Bringing out an inner strength

That gets us through each day

Even if there is a separation

From this world to the next

True Love will still survive

For it passes every test.

and

Destiny

Destiny first chose to make you a special part of my life

Destiny then chose to take you out of my life

The time destiny allowed us wasn't enough There could have been more

Whenever I start to feel bad that

Destiny took you out of my life

I will think of how sad

it would have been not to have known you Then I will thank Destiny for making you such a special part of my life

Giving to me so many precious memories

that will be with me for as long as I live.

I hope they give you some comfort, the pain get better but never goes away, we just learn to live with it. I pray that God sends you angels to help you heal.