Groups > This Marriage Thing

Not in defense of your husband, but my marriage is in the condition it is based on lack of communication or understanding of that communication. Each person has a way of living and when not in sync, one tries to compromise or act out or just be out of the picture, so to say. I lied about where I was because I did not want to be home – never did I cheat, but it was just as bad. Our trust level is gone, but I’ve learned to love myself again and be who I am. It’s taken some real B.S., but I can tell you to hang in there (not refereeing to the marriage- only you know that answer). I accept my wife and I can only leave it at that – don’t know what the future holds.

I love my wife very much and have throughout our many years together. I want to totally fulfill her and her me. She tells me that she is very happy with our marriage. In most ways, I am too.

However, we are so very different in what we want from each other and how we express love for each other. Even the way we communicate is so very different. Sex aside, I'm so lonely. She thinks dreamers are weak and pitiful, and I am a dreamer. I want to share my thoughts and desires, but she ridicules me when I do. It hurts deeply. Yet the love is stronger than the loneliness, so we remain together and find happiness where we can.

Ditto.I have been married 27 years second hubby, love him dearly, but got to have my space without questions, or there will be no marriage, and he understands, and I respect his wishes. Remember we are all individuals with our own set of values. Nothing is the same, not even a snowflake.

I really do. Frequently I feel that "in love" feeling, but always I love and like him. I'm blessed.

AS I started to read the discussion I thought about how I felt about my husband. We have been married for 23 years. I would have to say yes I do like my husband because he is my best friend. The only things I don't tell him are the things that will hurt him other than that it is all out there. He gives me advise and some I follow and some I don't. Same with him, he follows some of my advise and not other. Marrige is hard work and I think today's youth think get married and bliss happens, which is so not true. I also love him and I'm faithful to him or I wouldn't be in the marriage. We are different but I am more comfortable with him sometimes than my own kids. Does he piss me off? All the time! Do I tell him about it? Definitely. Do I piss him off? All the time! Does he tell me about it? Definitely. I guess that would mean we have trusting communication, knowing I can tell him anything and trust him to still be there after it's said. I also believe he has been faithful to me. I've never felt that disconnection. I know where he is and can check on it(and have in past)but as we grow older, the love stays the same but the like has grown.

There was a time when I 'liked' and 'loved' my husband. Now I can honestly say he makes me ill.

No. After 24 years I have tired of being told I am full of sh-- or that I am an idiot. I am sick to death of negativity and watching tv (news and boxing all the time) and of his constantly wanting me. How inconsisent and unappealing. I am tired of everything being an argument. Life is too short for this.