Suggestions from members on how to handle abuse here on TBD?

eve123

...IGNORE THEM ..!

Dirtballs only instigate when they get fed ..!

Have fun on TBD ..!!

Froggy

I just shared that with another member, kinda scary to thing I might be thinking like you froggy...did you slip me some of that funky juice of yours??? Maybe it was the eyes...

I am all for having fun and enjoy all my friends and groups, not one to take personally what someone may choose to view about me. Keeping it light, so my wings can carry me...when someone offers a foul wind, I just flutter bye....

And just wished to thank you for not putting butterflies in the breakfast shot...might have had to convert you to vegetarianism... to save a life, mine!

Can we have a virtual time out corner?

One minute for every year of age.

The only effective method of dealing with a 'troll' ( and this sounds like trollish behavior) is to ignore them. If the administrator removes them they just create another identity and are back in less time than it takes to tell about it.

I am a bit curious as to why you would PM someone who was obviously insulting and abusive to others? What did you think they would do? I realize you had lofty and laudable motives, but it puzzles me anyway.

Personally, I think such individuals are unhappy, insecure people and have no problem overlooking them, bless their hearts! ;-)

I'm sorry you had this experience though. Unfortunately the internet, like the rest of life is not closed to jerks. Remember, DFTT (don't feed the trolls;-) Peace.

I have had this happen only once. For the most part, I ignore and disregard those who feel they must attack in order to feel better about themselves. But only one time did I have to fight back. I, too, PM'd the person (I choose to have my arguments in private. It seems more adult, somehow.) I also PM'd the administrator to explain in case it all blew up. Long story short, the offensive party attacked back in private and I, like you, chose to ignore and did not reply. I have also left the group which was unfortunate.

Bottom line, this is a place for grown-ups; adults whose maturity should have gotten them past this high school BS. This is a place for people to communicate, to share, to find friends, to have fun, sometimes even to learn things. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. I do know that you can contact our community guide...Betty Ray is on leave but akabukowski is filling in for her. Perhaps you will be able to find some resolution with her help.

i need to speak up before i can ignore. i have tried the PM technique too. i have also flagged particularly offensive, insulting, degrading comments. and then it is time to....let it go. there are some major mind games going on here, and like others have already said, to respond is to feed into them.

but i had to get fooled a few times first before i learned that valuable lesson.

Although one of the good things about the Net is the ease of communication, there is a downside. The Net permits a certain degree of anonymity to the participants, allowing them to "say" things that they would never say in person.

Some (Many ?) of these people are, indeed, trolls and, as indicated, the thing to do (dofficult though it may be) is to ignore them, They get their jollies out of getting a rise out of people; if you ignore them, they will go away. In most cases, even messaging them doesn't help.

There is another apsect to this, though. Two things that are missing from internet groups are a) Tone; and b) Facial expression. A lot of times, the poster "hears" a tone when he posts that is not recognized by the readers. You (generic) might make a post that you feel is obviously sarcastic but, in the absence of tone, the readers don't recognize this. Similarly with facial expressions. what you can't see can hurt you.

The best thing to do is not jump to conclusions over an individual post. Stick around and see what happens. you may find you are missing some context. However, once you do identify a troll, the thing to do ignore him/her. make believe they're not even in the conversation. if everyone does that, soon enough, they won't be.