cheating men

I think they're pretty similar to women who cheat. Men have no monopoly on infidelity.

Cheating by anyone in any context - romantic or not - indicates a lack of character or unwillingness to take the consequences of being honest.

I completely agree with Michael and Isadora - cheating is awful and men aren't the only ones who do it. In the context of LTRs, it is important for couples to have clear agreements about what is or is not OK to do. Somethings may be obvious, but there is a lot of gray area out there. Since cheating is such a horrible offense, make sure you've clearly defined it so that there is no doubt.

Tell you this, I travel a lot and while I'm not a barfly, I sometimes hang at the bar, eat a burger and have a beer while watching a ball game of some sort. (Beats hanging in the room if you're not meeting somebody for diner). I don't go around parading myself as exceptional looking or anything but I take care of myself and I guess that garners attention? Anyway, I've had a lot of offers over the years and most times the offerer is wearing a wedding band and a few times I've asked, "What about your husband?" just to see what the answer will be and most of the time the answer is the same, "Becasue he cheats on me." Read into this what you will.

In some instances it's a fear of homosexuality or lack of self-confidence. By running around, a man can prove to himself that he isn't gay (those thoughts of his are just fantasies) and that he is really a man. Promiscuity can come from many things, and it really depends on the situation.

For instance, I knew a guy who I considered to be of exceptionally good character in all aspects of his life except one - fidelity to his wife. I feel that cheaters lie, liars steal, and a thief will cheat. It's a circle of character defects. Yet this person I knew never lied to me and wouldn't steal anything from anyone. Why did he have one girlfriend after another and stay out drinking all night? I never did figure that one out. Maybe he fell into the category I mentioned above, insecure in his masculinity?

I've heard so many reasons and explanations for this that I wonder whether an answer exists. We're human, we do stuff that makes no sense to anyone, including ourselves (in hindsight of course.)

I don't think about them at all. Instead, I think of their wives sitting at home, taking care of business for them while they act like pigs at the trough.

I don't care to waste even a single neuron of my brain worrying about why they do it. I would rather help their spouses make appropriate choices regarding what they will do about it.

By the way -- to all the cheating men who may be reading this. Your spouse does know. Maybe she is relieved that she doesn't have to service your pathetic physical needs any longer. What you gave her could hardly be called sex, let alone intimacy. What do you really give the pathetic creature you mopped up at the bar at 2:00 AM and is so drunk that she doesn't know or care that you are an inadequate jerk who she wouldn't shake hands with if she were sober or have the least bit of self respect?

Like the old joke goes ... I don't know why they call it ADULTery when both parties to it are acting like such ignorant CHILDREN!

No, I never cheated on my wife and as far as I know, she never cheated either. My anger? I know many wonderful women whose spouses tried to debase them by screwing the secretary or the local barfly. In the end, most of them ended up screwing themselves ... and their children! Their wives often wised up enough to leave and take the best parts of him with her: his 401K, the house, the car and most important of all, the kids, who often never want to see him again for abusing the family.

You want a new spouse? I can understand that. Even Aladdin got tired of the old light of his life! But when you cheat, you show the courage of a carrot and the brains of a broccoli. You want out? Leave the way you got in - legally. At least allow the woman whose life you took away to have more dignity than you are showing.

If it is the wife cheating, the same formula applies!

Michael was correct. It does take two to tango.