Is it me, or has the public gotten, meaner and cold since 9/11/01?

Traffic tickets bring in far more money than murders.

And they're good publicity because the cops never have to admit they can't catch one, except the occasional hit-and-run.

If you ever have doubts government agencies are giving up public safety for revenue enhancement, check out Virginia's $3,000.00 traffic fines. They even admitted it was for the money rather than safety.

I don't know that it's really since 9/11. I think it's a combination of things that keep people from feeling like they're a part of society. We spend a lot of time on the internet or playing computer games - and while the internet can keep us connected through sites like TBD, that's also time that we're in front of a computer, and not spent with another person.

Questions like this are really a sign of that very feeling - because I rarely see a question that asks "Have you noticed we've all gotten meaner?" Instead, the questions ask about the public, or other people, as if we weren't a part of it. The society is us. We are the people. We are the public. And every time someone says that society is getting colder or meaner? They're talking about US.

I believe with all my heart that each individual can make a difference. You can make the conscious choice to be kinder on the road, to not yell at people - even in your head! - to smile, to take the gentler path. It isn't 100%, but I have found that most people can be tremendously kind and open if you'll give them the chance to do so. There are some people so deeply enmeshed in their own concerns that you might not see a positive response from them right away.

I have a temper of my own, so this is something that I really do struggle with. On bad days I can find myself calling other drivers all kinds of nasty things. Those days aren't pretty, and they aren't good for anyone's soul. I try to consciously change my behavior on those days.

I find the opposite is true. Living in NY, since 9/11, people are nicer. Are there crazy people out there? Sure. But there are always crazy, angry people out there. If anything, most people have become more compassionate. The crazy ones will always be crazy. It has nothing to do with 9/11.

I get what you are saying, but I really have noticed, working with the public as closely as I do, a general paranoia and coldness, that frankly scares me.

If you knew me, you would know that I am the one that is nice, and smiles and lets people out in traffic, all the time. I totally believe that we can only change ourselves. I put this question up because I am trying to make more people think about how their actions do cause big ripple effects...I am not judging, just observing...Would it be better not to talk about it?

To Spuff,

Thanks for the positive feed back. It is reassuring to hear that your experience with the world around feels positive. I too live in NY, but the state, not the city. Maybe we were just far enough away from the tragedy to just react with fear, and paranoia that hasn't seemed to have lifted. I get the feeling NYC dealt with the terrible reality and let it go in a very healthy way, and moved on...only guessing...I am not an authority....maybe I just live in a very negative town!!!!

My daughter went to NYC with art club a couple of years back, and came back saying what you said. The people are so nice there!, she said. I believe it.

It's you.

8^ )

To be fair, it's not your fault ( It's always someone else's fault, isn't it?) But the media has a vested interest in increasing the Paranoia Public -- the expression "If it bleeds, it leads" has never been more apt. And if they don't have anything to scare the you-know-what out of you, they make it up! ("Wiping your butt can cause cancer -- see our story "Charmin ain't charmin no more at 11") The end result has been to put the general public on edge. But it's not that bad stuff has been happenning at a higher rate; you just hear about it more (and faster)

As for aggressive ticketing, it could be worse. At least they let you know. Around here, they've adopted the concept of the Speed Trap for several decades. And if they can't catch you speeding, they get you for going through a yellow light (go fight that one)

The thing to do is chill. Most of this stuff isn't worth getting your panties in a twist. Go ahead and vent, then let it go.

I'm in the state, not the city. The furtherest you can live from NYC & still be a NYC firefighter.