anxiety despair loneliness

You volunteer.

Help pets, old people, children, babies, etc. Go through an organization, hospital, etc.

You are lonely because you have needs. Needs to love, feel, etc. When you volunteer the recipients need your love and trust me you will feel unbelievably alive.

I appreciate that you don't want to (or don't have room to) go into the details of your life. WIthout any details, though, it makes it hard for us to respond.

In general, I would say that you'd want to engage in activities where you'd make some friends and the next time you're feeling anxious or desperate, you'd have a support system. But that's a long term view.

In the short term, I'd suggest that you use the telephone and email frequently to be in touch with loved ones who aren't living near you. If you are a religious person in any way, speak to the local clergy member. He or she doesn't need to know you well in order to want to help. Depending on the severity of the anxiety and desperation, you may want to consider counseling or group therapy. Again, without details it is hard to know what to suggest.

Horrible demons that these are, they CAN be tamed! AnitaP brought up the idea of volunteering . . . GREAT idea! You could also find a social group / activity based group. If your closest friends live far away, you may simply need to create new friends close by. If you pair that with an activity that you have an interest in, you will find great relief from your anxiety, despair, and lonliness. The idea is to insert yourself into something that makes you feel a part of something.

Whatever you do, however, do NOT allow yourself a great deal of time to dwell on these feelings. While it's healthy to acknowledge them, focusing on them can put you into a never ending downward spiral of negative emotions.

And, while we may not hold weekly meetings . . . WE'RE a bit of a support group. ;0)

These are such great replies there's not much I can add except "This too shall pass"

Volunteering is wonderful, suddenly your problems seem very small and insignifigant compared to others.

And focus on what u want you in your life, not the immediate problems. Dream your dreams, just let you'r thoughts be possitive as they mirrow your reality.

Personally, I could not make it without my pets, they warm your heart and soul and ease the pain.

Love yourself and find comfort in being you.

Your life details aren't important; we all have strifes, but you are the best company you have, and you just have to learn how to appreciate YOU.

Use your time to pamper yourself and, through this, you will find a re-newed confidence. That in itself will draw people to you.

Attitude is everything. Once you're confident, strong and ready to move forward, try joining 'MeetUP.com' which list folks who share your common interests. It's city-wide and an excellent source in getting out of the house.

I assure you that loneliness is all in the mind so it's up to you to change your mindset by focusing on what you have to offer. Explore your many talents and make them work for you. You have a lot to offer so, Trippihippy, get off that couch (unless your toenails are still wet).

Trippihippy-I FEEL your pain, and am so sorry that you are currently in a dark place. I have also experienced some very, very difficult losses and hardships in this life. I know that you've posted on tbd in the past, regarding sadness over loss of contact with your kids, a bad relationship, etc. Many of us have also survived broken relationships, and some heavy issues with our children.

There are many good suggestions from others here, to help you pull OUT of yourself. I've also found tremendous hope and courage, by volunteering and helping people who don't have food, shelter, etc. In addition, there are support groups, contact help phone lines, in every town/city, and most ministers will listen to you, and be willing to help, even if you are not a member of their church, or a believer.

Additionally, MAKE yourself get out of the house, even if it's a simple walk in your yard/neighborhood, and try to call an old friend, family, teacher, job associate, etc., whom you've lost touch with. I also agree that we should not dwell on the negative things, but focus on taking baby steps, and making it through one day at a time.

Pets are great healers/ companions, too.We had a dear, funny cat for 14 years, and currently have an amazing pound pup, who,"smiles" all of the time, and brightens our lives! Good luck, trippihippy, you DO HAVE FRIENDS HERE, please continue to vent with us, and remember the heartfelt words of the so wise, globally respected Dalai Lama," NEVER give up, no matter what is happening, or going on around you."

Hi, sorry that you are in a tough place. Try going to local free activities. Most public libraries have free classes. Camera clubs, computer classes, book clubs, are all free where I live.

The local chamber of Commerce might list free

actives in your area. The Humane Society generally needs a person to play with the puppies and kitties. For an inexpensive activity, try a beauty school. Get a low cost manicure. If you are brave, get a low cost hair cut at the beauty school.

Are you a christian? Read the bible. Start in Psalms or the book of John. Read Joyce Meyer,

Battlefield of the Mind book.

I will pray for you, Mary Beth