Scheduling Sex

You won't be surprised that I totally agree. The myth is that people who are in love should simply fall into each others' arms. That happens, but typically only during the hot-and-heavy period at the start of relationships. After that, as sexual urgency declines, "the mood" tends not to strike both partners at the same time, so the result is frustration. Not to mention that busy people often find they don't have the time for sex to "just happen spontaneously." Many many people fight the idea of scheduling sex, my wife and I among them years ago. Everyone thinks sex should happen spontaneously. But in longterm relationships, if you wait until it's spontaneous, sex almost never happens. If you want it to happen regularly, get out your calendars and schedule it. If you have doubts about scheduling, just try it for a few months. I bet you'll like it.

Especially for couples with young children, demanding careers or any situation that drains energy, sex does need to be scheduled or it runs the risk of being dropped from the schedule altogether. Once it is dropped, it is so difficult to pick up again as if nothing happened.

Even older couples whose sex drives have reduced may be best off scheduling sex because if it is something scheduled, they prepare for it and build up to that night. And, sex does not have to involve penetration. Unless you grew up in a nunnery, you learn that there must be a hundred ways to pleasure you partner. If you grew up in a nunnery, you probably only learned the missionary position because many of them are missionaries!

If sex is important, better have it here because there may be none in the next world. How else would you account for all them terrorist virgins waiting there? Do you think there is an unlimited supply of virgins? Not on any planet I know of!

I would love to try this again, but unfortunately my husband will only have sex if my daughter is out of the house, and she's not out of the house on any schedule.

I'm thinking that I should take a morning off every couple of weeks to do this.

For todays busy "married couples" with kids, work, after school activities, family visits etc etc etc ,,I can understand very much so, why a "sex schedule" would be very helpful ..at least to some degree.

But for "married lovers", with the same life complexity as a "married couple" ..we schedule sex availibilty ..24 hours a day x 365 days a year ..! But then again, we are addicted to each other ..and sex !

Hey,

There's nothing wrong with scheduling sex! Man, I know how it goes with two kids and both my wife and I work full time. I wish I had more energy too at times to be more sponteneous, but I've learned that you just have to make the time. I like to go out to dinner and then come home and relax, then...

Dinner is like a little foreplay time for us, or at least for me. I like to hit on her during dinner...play... stuff like that...it's really fun!

tpschier

Carol T

Do it...take a morning off and do it....

CarolT, This is EXACTLY what we had to do when the kids were younger. Just don't forget to take snow days into account.