Since I'm only a couple hours from Louisville I thought I'd jog over and buy your breakfast, no strings attached of course. I'll help you look for LanSr.

You will NOT find me in the little town of Cross Timbers country, TX, gimping up and down the main Texas drag with my copper colored cane tapping time to my quasi-shortened stride, holding either white bags from the IGA/Library, or yellow bags from Dollar General. I will not be the one wearing the 7 1/8 Stomper or Green Boom Town Steak & Fish House cap, depending on mood, and puliing up on either Tony Llama or Dr Scholl's striders on the Shoe Leather Express I

to the grey/blue paint-peeling house with cracked concrete steps flanked by US and Texas flags shining in the Texas prairie town sun. Comanche, the grey/white neutered tom will be lying guard on the porch. Do not be swayed by his sleepy expression and indolent posture, and offer to help when you carry me kicking and screaming into the cyberPatrol car; he'll be there for me...

So, nanner, nanner, nanner... you can't find me... now, if kat, Tielle or the inspiring Yanna were looking for me, or Westerly and CarolT in a pinch, there I'd let 'em chase me 'til I caught 'em... tho' there, my wife Jeanne on her walker might outrun me too when I''m in the mood...

Dear BMichael:

I put your picture in a frame. It is here, beside my computer. Was it really you? It was, wasn't it? I saw the dawgs dragging you over to Starbucks but then....I thought I saw you heading to "Fred's Lounge" in the Marriott, but I dimissed the thought. And on my way home, when I saw those dawgs again, tied up outside the Marriott, And, of course, because I hunger for fur coated hugs and wet kisses, I stopped for a rub or two. It was then I thought I saw you inside the lounge with a contestant in this writing contest - again, I dismissed the thought as I was so confused but

THEN I heard through the grapevine the results were determined BEFORE I submitted my entry, before I placed LANSR in a trance, before poor WESTERLY was spending all her time begging for mercy and working so hard to gain the lead - and then there is poor DEE who was writing again trying to gain a vote or two - AND FOR WHAT I ASK!!!!!!!???????

Now trust me that I do not believe everything I hear. I shall give you the true benefit of a doubt in this matter. But, please tell me it is NOT true, that you would not allow something like this to take place....I never told anyone I saw you "out"... Well, that is until I just posted Westerly on the update thread. I did tell her 'bout what I heard.

Do the right thing, BMichael. You know what that is! Be honest and upright in this decision and come clean with the panel of judges.

I have not turned your picture face down yet. It is here beside me still......I know you have a conscience.. er uh...well, I hope you have gained one of those since those long ago high school daze....

uh, did you say something about background checks?

listen, i gotta run. it's been a real slice of, well, pie.

While leaving him in the dust, my addy is (garbled in translation)... mmm, just in case you didn't mind me sitting down on top of you, um (kicks dust with soulful look)... y'know, um, I want my Mommy, this is scary...

(Dang! Can only vote once)... whistling Sioux city Sue...

...whew!...I'm relieved to know that its not the steroids!