Posted: Oct 3, 08 7:25pm
In the early morning dew
lies finely scattered beads of chance,
that slowly fade, as the day grows long
till once again, nighttime falls
COMMENT

nicely put,thank you!
Well done. You say a lot in very few words. I am wondering if "chance" has a double meaning: opportunities, and also chance happenings in life? I read the poem twice, and each time it struck me differently.
That was my goal, I started to use the word opportunity, but felt it was too limiting, too concise.. the original opening line was
"in the early morning light dew" I was trying for a bit of word play, but it just came out too awkward..I was also reaching for a connection between "Dew" and "Do" in the title, but I don't that stood out either. Thanks for your comments!
Dennis, in just a few words you are able to convey the urgency of taking into account each minute. I see in this both the chances of a day ... and the chances of a lifetime ... all cycles that begin with hope and end with night fall.
Kudos.
This is very much like Haiku.
Thanks for such beauty.
Absolutely clever, full of promise...
Good writing :-)
Thank you CJ, for the kind words! I'm wondering, what would you think of this piece if I changed "Dew" to "Do" in both places?
"In the early morning do
lies finely scattered beads of chance,"
Too much?
