In pastel colors, rich in hue, the sky begins to swirl

And, in the clouds, I begin to see the image of a girl

Excellent ... Fabulous ... I put them together below.

"Zeitgeisst"

The mountain mist beyond our reach with promises of rain

Swells like waves beyond the beach: The ebb begins again.

In pastel colors, rich in hue, the sky begins to swirl

And, in the clouds, I begin to see the image of a girl

The clouds and mist become more gray, the

girl is dressed in dark, She wears a shawl

of mist-made lace, her necklace..., a

lightening spark.

(Did I stay with the meter?)

yes, I think you did stay with the meter, within a syllable or two, but the line breaks didn't work right. Does this help?

The clouds and mist become more gray, the girl is dressed in dark,

She wears a shawl of mist-made lace, her necklace..., a lightening spark.

Hi ZenDog: That's helpful. Being new to poetry, could you tell me what is a line break? If it's about spacing between sentences, I couldn't get my computer to line them up properly. Thanks.

The line breaks are just where the word wrap takes place - [carriage return?] Usually in poetry the line breaks at the end of the line, but this being a poem with lines between 14 and 16 syllables, the word wrap kinda takes over.

I mean, I assume you did intend your lines to end on the words dark and spark, which is more or less in keeping with the spec.