Well, Ian, I can kinda relate. My kids and I don't have a perfect relationship - in fact, my relationship with my oldest son is distant but getting better. Hopefully things will work out for you - I think they will eventually.

Good to know it's not just me. How are you going about changing things?

I call him and e-mail from time to time. He's a busy young man with a life of his own, so I try not to intrude too much. He's called me from time to time for advice, so it's not like he completely ignores me.

My son and I were communicating through MySpace but it is very patchy. I haven't heard from him in a while. It's frustrating to say the least when you have no other avenues.

I would just like to add my 2 cents from the other side. My children became estranged from their dad as adults. We had been apart since they were 8,6 & 2. I never kept them from him but at ages 18-20 they each made their own choice. What I would like to share with you is that he initially tried to contact them after each quarrel and then just stopped. Each one has told me that they felt like he didn't even care because he just stopped TRYING. I don't know when or how they would have accepted his approaches, but I do know they expected him to keep trying.

So I would hope you just hang in there & stay in touch in whatever way you can and pray it just gets better.

Thank you. It's not that I didn't care or stop trying I became cut-off cold. The longer I tried without getting any response the more hurt I became. I had to make some sort decision about getting on with my life. Even now with my son I send messages and get no responses. Having only one avenue for communication doesn't help much. I guess he feels in control of the situation and this is how he is protecting himself.

Parental Alienation is a very real reality. God bless you as you reach out to others in like cause and effect.