Posted: Jun 17, 08 2:04am
New Rule - No more cellphones at the Movies. Gee, you ain't that important so shut the f@%$ up, turn it off, and shove it up your a@@!
New Rule - Enough with Star Trek Conventions. William Shatner is almost dead. I realize none of you guys have ever had a date but dressing up like a f@%#ing Klingon isn't going to get you laid. And, hate to say it, but you all are just a bunch of losers with nothing better to do sorta like those kids from old TV shows.
New Rule - Get Rid of a lot of Judge Shows! People's Court, Judge Judy, and Judge Mathis are fine. The rest are bunch of losers that couldn't stay on the bench. Judge Alex, you're a Judge not a bloody psychologist!
New Rule - I don't give a sh@t about a new planet in our solar system. We can't take care of the one we live in. I realize Geeks get their rocks off discovering other planets and other galaxies. That's what Geeks do. They figure no girl on earth will f@%# them, except those chicks on the Internet that have webcams and charge $3.99 a minute, so they find new planets in a desperate hope the girls there will f@$% them! Hey, Geeks, sorry to break the news to you, but they won't either.
New Rule - The iPhone is for stupid people. Yes, it is. A businessperson, have to be politcally f@#$ing correct, uses a Blackberry NOT an iPhone. Geeks have an orgasm everytime head Geek Steve Jobs announces a new one. And, the reason they are now cheap is because it is a repeal on the Geek Tax. Still, nobody but poor geeks are buying them and stupid high school girls. I just want a cellphone that I can use from EVERYWHERE! I don't care about porn on a cellphone or the latest BattleStar Galactica show. I just need to make a phone call. All I need is a cellphone that fits in my pocket, doesn't break if, well, when, I drop it down some stairs, causes brain cancer, and causes people with a pacemaker to have a heart attack. I didn't know it was a heart attack I just thought someone was having a seizure. And, just like the movie theater, if you have an iPhone, shove it up your a@@ because Apple will gladly sell your another one and I own their stock!
