It's unfortunate your marriage was so one-sided. Given that, divorce is not such a terrible alternative. There is much to be said for being an independent woman who is free, if you choose, to find other partners who will respect you.

Thanks, Isadora, for your insight!

Yes you are right about what you said--there is so much more for me to say about this but at least I gave an insight about how my marriage was!

I really never wanted divorce but with the way things were, I had no choice but to make this decision and end it--which was painful--but now I have to think of me--the person I am!

Again thanks for your feedback--I appreciate it very much!

God's Blessings to you!

Lidia

You know this was a blessing, getting a divorce, for you in order to grow, and have an learning experience that we have to face in life. If you wasnt ready for a divorce, than that shows a sign of codepence? With out us actknowledging it? I was in the same situation for 19 years, unconsciously. But "for me" something had to change in order for me to grow, GOD" dose things to us for reasons.

You say you didn't want to divorce a man who is abusive, controlling, made you feel like a prisoner, and broke your heart to pieces? I'm guessing that a few years from now, you'll look back on this and thank God you got divorced.

Hi Lidia.....OMG what is wrong with these men! Unfortuately, I too recently divorced after 25 years of marriage. I was to blame for his unhappiness, regardless of what I did to try to make him happy. What I finally realized was that we need to be happy with ourselves before we can be happy with anyone else and no one is responsible for our happiness but us. Even though I thought I didn't want a divorce, frankly, ater one year being single, I feel the best I have in years. My friends are "welcoming me back" since I had lost so much of myself waisting time on this ungrateful, selfish man. My only regret now is that I waited so long to get rid of him! Good luck with your new life and be sure to go out with your fiends and find new interests...there is great satisfaction in being your own person.

Thanks to all of you who responded to my post! Blessings to everyone!

Lidiaxoxoxoxoxo

Michael--thanks for your comments! it's really refreshing to see a man's point of view on some things! And yours was just that

I wanted the abuse to go away but well that never would do so I already know that my divorce was something that had to be! For my own sanity!

But the lonliness afterwards--darn it can be hard to bear! Sure i enjoy my friends and the female company but it would be nice to find a special male companion--but where I live it's useless!

Anyway--thanks again for your insight! I really appreciate it!

Lidia