Thanks for the invite, TB. Doesn't appear we have a ton in common, yet much of what you say about what makes you tick resonates with me.

I live in the city, dream about the country. Can't think of a "character" I resemble. I am married and have four kids. Providing for my family in multiple forms is the central undertaking of my life. Gotta dog but no horses. Don't hunt; do fish.

I did not serve in the armed forces. In fact, I actively and with all the determination I could muster opposed the war in Vietnam (and the one today as well) and unabashedly refused induction in the army 37 years ago. I am and will ever be a thumb in the eye of swift boating and swift boaters of any stripe, anywhere. I love my country and my many friends and family who are vets. Would proudly help defend this land against any authentic threat. I was in Manhattan on 9/11 and won't forget. Not sure why, but thought it important to say all that.

When time and body allow, I play touch football, soccer, and basketball. Plus a lot of catch with my kids. I ride a Triumph Bonneville mc, and ski and skate when I can. I like to row and am learning to fly fish.

I wish I could say I am planting trees, but I am not. I am trying to plant the seeds of a better education in my kids's schools. I love to read books and listen to music. I fantasize about buying a drum kit and banging away like I did 35+ years ago.

I think being a man is a life's work, and mostly about humility, patience, and invisible bravery. It's also about listening. I still have a lot of work to do.

Thanks Dave, I agree (although agreement isn't important, it's the thoughts). We come in different shades and colors.

Humility

Patience

Invisible bravery.......listening

thanks..

TB

Hi Teddy. Thank you for inviting me here. I am completely not a man at all... however I am a major FAN of Man.

I like many things you all enjoy. For instance, TB, you plant trees, I plant trees. My trees usually get flowers on them at some point, so that's why I keep planting them. I also have been caught hugging the occasional tree, just for giggles. I also hug my house occasionally because I love it so!!! OK, girl, remember?

And I see DaveM rides a delightful Triumph Bonneville mc and I adore delightful old mc's of all make and model. I used to own some mc's myself, but I broke a nail and gave it up shortly thereafter (or something like that). Last one was a HD. It was ok, but I had more fun 4 wheeling.

I have no kids, but I do have 3 dogs and a cat to keep me from feeling like I have no reason to go to the grocery store (they eat like PIGS).

I like game, but only eat non-carnivores for my own reasons of insanity. I make really really delicious BambiLoaf. I no longer like to make the beef kind because the Bambi kind is much tastier, and no greasy "tallow" aftertaste. I have only one pack of venison burger left in my freezer, and my supplier is not so free with donations to my house any more. He hasn't had a good year in about two seasons of hunting, so unless things change drastically, I won't be getting any venison this year.

Transplanted Tree Hugging Yankee Liberal in the South. Yup, I can take it. Daddy didn't raise any sissies (because Mommy would not stand for THAT).

I SO want to learn to fly fish. It is on my list of things to do. Near the tippy top.

The only other important thing I can say is, that I have always hung around with a bunch of guys, and I see it is no different here on TBD. Thanks, fellahs, for making a girl feel right at home!

hi tbear..thanx for inviting me to join your group..i hope i'll be able to contribute something worthwhile from a female perspective. personally i think it shows real class when you can be a "renaissance man" and also communicate by writing..i'm so impressed! you once asked me for my pic, here 'tis so you don't think i look like a horse..

Welcome gals! Thanks spunky for finally giving me some eyes to look into when I write, or write you. I'm delighted.

My scare is that I developed a discussion of "bragging rights" to who is a "real man". I told about my opinion cause I'm still under development. It is not about things. It is what we do as a man. If someone says, "you're a jerk cause you shoot bambi", well, be heard. It's ok. My kids think this whole draft horse thing is stupid "use the tractor!". But these are reflections of my inner self. Like David said, his development into manhood is different. And we will be different as Old Men. But to have an ecclectic group of people share their values is fascinating. Blonde started a separate discussion. I think to be fair, someone who wants should start a "real woman" discussion here.

By the way Jaki, " I got game" so if you get too low send the huntsman here or I' ll have to bring some myself when I look at your art and make margarita's. Someday.

Bear and David,

In your own ways, you both sound like "men" :)

Having been a girl all my life, I certainly appreciate men! I've had experience with a few, and wish I could combine traits in three specific ones to create my own perfect man.

I am raising a son on my own - he's almost 2 and a half, and his dad lives 3,000 miles away from us. It's a challenge for me to learn to be a "boy" and appreciate the bugs, mud, farts and burps, and learning to pee standing up as fully as my son appreciates all these things. He has some good role models in his life, which I am eternally grateful for. There are some things I just don't get.

As a mom, and a woman, though, I want my son to be the kind of man who:

Opens doors for women, whether they appreciate it or not.

Can take no for an answer, and be okay with it.

Is willing to share what he has (whether it's money, knowledge, compassion, whatever) with someone who needs it.

Is able to support himself financially, and eventually a family.

Doesn't shirk his responsibilities.

Is able to do his own laundry without turning things pink.

Can talk through a problem, rather than punch through it - but still be able to stand up for himself and others when the need arises.

Knows why there are two forks on the table, even if he doesn't use both of them.

Is respectful of others, and is tolerant of those very different from him.

I want my son to grow up happy and loved, and be secure enough to know that not everyone will like him, and that's okay.

Well, I've made myself cry :).

Now, if anyone can tell me why it's so fun to pee in the bathtub, that'd be great. It's one of those boy things I don't think I get.

Another one here who's emphatically not a man, but had the pleasure of being married to one for over twenty years. He was a thoughtful participant in the world, a caretaker of both his family and the world around him. He helped young people grow into good adults, both as a Boy Scout leader and a Sunday school teacher for junior high kids. He never dropped the ball in our family, and loved me and our son without limits.

There are guys, and guys can be fun. And then there are men. I'm proud that this one man loved me the way he did, and that our son (now 19) is growing into a man himself.