I'm actually a big fan of the coffee idea, especially if it's the first time meeting someone that I've been talking to online. Gives me a way out, gives him a way out. I want something that has no pressure on either side.

If I know the person already, but we're making the switch to a dating relationship, that changes things somewhat. Then we can discuss what might be fun for both of us, and go from there. It depends on the person and what's available.

I think that would work for a first date too and what you have in common.

Even a nice thing like going for a carriage ride in the city can go south if horse poop is a bit ripe. Things are going to go wrong

less stress and more fun!

I agree that the coffee date is a nice, "safe" one. However, an informal dinner date would work, too. . .nothing too fancy, just anyplace to sit and talk, with a little food for distraction if things become too awkward. If things go well, we can sit and talk for hours. If not, then we finish dinner and go our own ways.

Dinner commits me for too long a period if the man and I aren't hitting it off... I am a huge fan of the coffee/drinks date finite let them know I have plans and have to be somewhere... I can always call and cancel plans if it is working out and I want to spend some time with him.

I guess I've just been lucky. . .last really BAD dinner date I had, we met at 6 pm and by 7 pm I was on my way home. Fortunately, I didn't have to be as rude as he had been through the dinner, and he actually even e-mailed and asked for another date. Needless to say, I was "busy."

Dating sounds liked it hasnt changed much.

Now I see why Oprah has a book club.

After going a while without a date, you can always take two of Oprah's books of the week and smash them together on your ...ummm, never mind.