Maybe it's too early to tell, she may be trying to get to know you better first, -or- she's hiding something. Those are the things I think of after reading your message.

Don't build up any hopes or expectations.

She doesn't seem to want to develop a close or personal relationship with you. Maybe you are not the only one.

I'm with ClareFair. I personally think she wants to know you better before meeting you. It's not about "controlling the relationship"--it's probably not about you at all. It's about limiting her risks and being selective. I have been reading your posts, and I'm wondering if you're not moving too fast in this case.

Frankly, when you're a woman online, giving away your phone number or direct e-mail address is practically the same as crawling into bed with a stranger...

She's just not that into you, dear.

Hip, Some people seem to do online dating, and then don't want to date. I don't understand this at all, it's happened to me several times. This is one of the reasons i quit doing online dating. This and the posers pretending they want relationships, when they really want something much less emotional....

Next time you talk, ask her if she would mind telling you how long she has been doing this. I say this because my first attempt at online dating was very difficult. I was not sure and certainly somewhat fearful of what could happen. I only chose to do it because two friends did and had some enjoyable experiences. I was not so lucky my first time around.

I was not prepared to give out a private email or phone number then. Now I have a little more awareness and can speak from my experience. I set up a yahoo account just for such emails. It is more personal and opens for trust. I like to email to establish some ground, humor can be difficult and sometimes you need to be careful how you state it, but it can be cleared up if there is a misunderstanding. Phone calls are better, once you feel comfortable,don't rush it with someone if you really like them.

The phone call, after I sense he and I have a place to connect, I ask for his number and use a number that is not traceable, (a friend's suggestion) and after the 3rd call, I usually agree to meet with him.

I didn't like exchanging pics before, but now I see it is helpful. I will do this privately usually, not open on line.

I have posted pics but find it is not the kind of man I wish to get to know. Those who have responded to pictureless posts seem much more interesting. Not sure why.

I think it is not the best way to treat someone to interrupt the call unless it is previously indicated as needed. If she is not calling back, then she is not reliable, why persue it? Respect yourself and your needs too. Meeting someone is not the point, but meeting someone you would enjoy being with. As it stands from your discussion, you don't seem to be enjoying this. Best to you Jim.

As for control, maybe she is a little fearful and needs time to feel she can trust you. Just a thought.Sometimes the world seem scary, especially for women. Try not to read too much into it, or take it personally. You could be right though in thinking this is not the best situation for you.

Well from what you have said about the other person. Is that you are getting a message, and it is loud and clear. Only when thing about love it's hard to let go.