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Created:: December 20, 2007
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Is it just me?

Posted: Jul 10, 08 9:28am

Picture this, Me, a 48 year old sitting at the kitchen table crying because I feel the depression coming on like a freight train and there is not a damn thing I can do about it but sit here and take it head on. I know what it will do, That's why I cry. It has already started my physical pain to hurt even worse and also has interfered with my relationships with the people I love. It is tearing me apart from the inside out.

I have been to all the doctors and taken all the pills, they have adjusted the dosages I don't know how many times, but I continue to take them because I'm too afraid to stop in fears of a full blown depression attack or whatever will come

23 years I've been praying for the pain and the depression to go away and I guess I will continue to pray and maybe Someday God will hear me and decide to help me out a little cause this is not living a happy life at all

I will leave you all with these words of wisdom : PAIN SUCKS !!

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Body & Mind, mental health

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4 Comments // 5 Members

cupcake3

Posted: Jul 10, 08 9:57am

Hi Madmooser,

Just read your post.

You may just be venting and not want ideas, but I am going to take a leap here and suggest two things that have worked for me.

Have you tried taking Vitamin D? It is the sunshine vitamin as you probably have heard. It is something I kind of stumbled onto a few years ago. If you have any tendencies towards seasonal effectiveness disorder( it usually begins for most in Aug, you may get it early, who knows?) this can really help. Check with GNC store. Vitamin D was hard to find in other stores for me.

The other idea is getting one of the full spectrum light bulbs or more to use. One is supposed to expose themselves to this light for 20mins upon rising in the AM. It helps reset the body clock so to speak for people that have SED. My last boss put them in all of our rooms at work and man! What a huge difference in how we all felt year round. It really gives you a mental lift for moods and also increases human effectiveness levels..reducing stress, reducing fatigue greatly!!

Almost weekly now, the Sunday Parade magazine insert in the paper has an add for a lamp with full spectrum bulb for $19.99. They used to cost much,much more so I was unable to try one.

This last idea will sound trite probably but it is based on scientific research. Try to start your day with the positive statement,"Today is going to be a great day. Something really good is going to happen for me." Research has shown that by "tricking" our brain or our "computer" that runs our body with positive "feed", no matter how bad we are feeling our body will believe whatever we tell it. No matter how bad you feel, or how bad things are,if you announce positive thoughts whether aloud or to yourself, your brain will be able to increase it's immune system, endorphins,(nature's own feel good chemical)for you.

Lastly, I know that God is listening and hearing your requests for help. He works with your faith in Him. The positive thoughts and your focus on believing will "allow" Him to answer you.

I am praying myself for you. I am sure that your family wants for you to feel well and be happy again. I am also sure that they love you and are very worried about your depression and pain, and may feel quite helpless in trying to help you to feel better. Smile if you can, reach out in love and the love will come back to you. If you can not let the extreme pain that you feel take over every part of who you are, you will have more power over your pain. God will do the rest if you can divert the depressive thoughts during the day to believing with all of your heart that help is on the way.

I really hope something I have said here can be of help.

I hope someday to see your user name changed to something like,Mooserjoy, happymooser,peacefulmooser...that may be a good first step toward a positive outlook that will prove to be healing in the end. Baby steps.....

Hi Madmooser, Just read your post. You may just be venting and not want ideas, but I am going to take a leap here and suggest two things that have worked for me. Have you tried taking Vitamin D? It is the sunshine vitamin as you probably have heard. It is something I kind of stumbled onto a few years ago. If you have any tendencies towards seasonal effectiveness disorder( it usually begins for most in Aug, you may get it early, who knows?) this can really help. Check with GNC store. Vitamin D was hard to find in other stores for me. The other idea is getting one of the full spectrum light bulbs or more to use. One is supposed to expose themselves to this light for 20mins upon rising in the AM. It helps reset the body clock so to speak for people that have SED. My last boss put them in all of our rooms at work and man! What a huge difference in how we all felt year round. It really gives you a mental lift for moods and also increases human effectiveness levels..reducing stress, reducing fatigue greatly!! Almost weekly now, the Sunday Parade magazine insert in the paper has an add for a lamp with full spectrum bulb for $19.99. They used to cost much,much more so I was unable to try one. This last idea will sound trite probably but it is based on scientific research. Try to start your day with the positive statement,"Today is going to be a great day. Something really good is going to happen for me." Research has shown that by "tricking" our brain or our "computer" that runs our body with positive "feed", no matter how bad we are feeling our body will believe whatever we tell it. No matter how bad you feel, or how bad things are,if you announce positive thoughts whether aloud or to yourself, your brain will be able to increase it's immune system, endorphins,(nature's own feel good chemical)for you. Lastly, I know that God is listening and hearing your requests for help. He works with your faith in Him. The positive thoughts and your focus on believing will "allow" Him to answer you. I am praying myself for you. I am sure that your family wants for you to feel well and be happy again. I am also sure that they love you and are very worried about your depression and pain, and may feel quite helpless in trying to help you to feel better. Smile if you can, reach out in love and the love will come back to you. If you can not let the extreme pain that you feel take over every part of who you are, you will have more power over your pain. God will do the rest if you can divert the depressive thoughts during the day to believing with all of your heart that help is on the way. I really hope something I have said here can be of help. I hope someday to see your user name changed to something like,Mooserjoy, happymooser,peacefulmooser...that may be a good first step toward a positive outlook that will prove to be healing in the end. Baby steps.....

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Posted: Jul 10, 08 9:57am

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Hi Madmooser,

Just read your post. 
    You may just be venting and not want ideas, but I am going to take a leap here and suggest two things that have worked for me.
     Have you tried taking Vitamin D? It is the sunshine vitamin as you probably have heard. It is something I kind of stumbled onto a few years ago. If you have any tendencies towards seasonal effectiveness disorder( it usually begins for most in Aug, you may get it early, who knows?) this can really help. Check with GNC store. Vitamin D was hard to find in other stores for me. 
     The other idea is getting one of the full spectrum light bulbs or more to use. One is supposed to expose themselves to this light for 20mins upon rising in the AM. It helps reset the body clock so to speak for people that have SED. My last boss put them in all of our rooms at work and man! What a huge difference in how we all felt year round. It really gives you a mental lift for moods and also increases human effectiveness levels..reducing stress, reducing fatigue greatly!! 
    Almost weekly now, the Sunday Parade magazine insert in the paper has an add for a lamp with full spectrum bulb for $19.99. They used to cost much,much more so I was unable to try one. 
    This last idea will sound trite probably but it is based on scientific research. Try to start your day with the positive statement,"Today is going to be a great day. Something really good is going to happen for me." Research has shown that by "tricking" our brain or our "computer" that runs our body with positive "feed", no matter how bad we are feeling our body will believe whatever we tell it. No matter how bad you feel, or how bad things are,if you announce positive thoughts whether aloud or to yourself, your brain will be able to increase it's immune system, endorphins,(nature's own feel good chemical)for you. 
    Lastly, I know that God is listening and hearing your requests for help. He works with your faith in Him. The positive thoughts and your focus on believing will "allow" Him to answer you. 
     I am praying myself for you. I am sure that your family wants for you to feel well and be happy again. I am also sure that they love you and are very worried about your depression and pain, and may feel quite helpless in trying to help you to feel better. Smile if you can, reach out in love and the love will come back to you. If you can not let the extreme pain that you feel take over every part of who you are, you will have more power over your pain. God will do the rest if you can divert the depressive thoughts during the day to believing with all of your heart that help is on the way. 
     I really hope something I have said here can be of help. 
      I hope someday to see your user name changed to something like,Mooserjoy, happymooser,peacefulmooser...that may be a good first step toward a positive outlook that will prove to be healing in the end. Baby steps.....

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margevans

Posted: Jul 10, 08 2:24pm

Hey,

I just got thru going to the counselor and was at one of my highest pain levels in awhile.

I had also just seen my doctor.I've been saying I have a sinus problem,she said it's allergies and called a prescription in.Whatever it is I have been out of my mind at times.

I have been this bad for 4 yrs,going thru migraine attacks severly for 10,so I cannot imagine what you go thru.

I hate crying because it makes my pain in my head go way up.But like you said,you have to.Who the hell could hold it in?And if I do,it takes it's toll anyway.

Chronic pain is so much more than people can know unless they go thru it.And even then,I don't know your pain.I know mine and it is unreal sometimes.

I am going thru it right now.I took an Imetrex and then another.I promise you,it is not like those commercials where you smile and go dancing across the room.

I told my counselor today that most people would want to put their head thru a wall,which I would've gladly done.

I get what you're saying re: God.Last week I the pains in my head sharp shooting,nonstop,I really thought it was it.I just asked God if it was to please just make it quick.

The depression can be just as bad.I write this not to focus on me,but to let you know you're not alone in feeling defeated.

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Milt T

Posted: Jul 10, 08 3:59pm

If you have physical pain, invest in a chiropractor. It will relieve a lot of the bunched up muscles that arrive with bouts of depression. Or, do what I did ...

I have physical pain from arthritis and I bought a shiatsu electric massage cushion. It was the best $49 I ever invested. I simply put the thing where the pain is and let it give me a hard massage for 20 minutes. It doesn't eliminate the pain but it eases it ... and no matter what mood I'm in, I don't have to please the thing to get it to massage me!

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MSKTN

Posted: Jul 17, 08 6:34am

Sometimes I think I'm the only one in the world to have such feelings.

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