If you have already ruled out the two most effective methods of dealing with depression, what magic formula do you think anyone else can give you?

Elsewhere you post on marriage problems which could be either the cause of your depression or the result of it. It certainly would have its effect! See a good doctor or a good psychotherapist and then decide. What's most effective for depression is a combination of medication (which is not forever) and learning new coping skills with life's problems. If you don't think your own doctor or your stepson's therapist sound trustworthy, choose someone else - maybe a woman.

(Somehow my response disappeared, so I'll try again)

April, therapy and medication are the most effective means of combating depression. If you already eliminate both what magic formula could anyone else supply?

Choose a new doctor if you don't like your own, and a new therapist if you feel your stepson's wouldn't be helpful.

You posted elsewhere on marriage problems that could be either cause or result of your depression. Certainly they contribute. So for the sake of improving your marriage as well as your own wellbeing, go see someone.

I will try I just dont wanna be all drugged up you know it changes who you are I am concerned about the people around me that it effects Im just nervous about the outcome of which method I choose I wish I could just make it go away but nothing comes that easy does it lol thank you so much for your comment and your time have a great day

April,

I know what you mean about your whole post.But,take it from someone thats had problems off and on since I was 13,I am 61 now!For years I didnt want to be doped up either.And for years I would go off my medication as soon as I began feeling better,then I would get "sick"again.

Look at your depression as you would any other illness.If you had a headache and it stayed for day after day,month after month,you would give in to an aspirin or some other type of medicine.

Please see a good therapist and try medicine.If you dont feel right on it than tell your doctor.

Believe me,depression isnt something to ignore.

God bless you and help you with this problem.

Your friend,

Kay

I think that I will try medication and a theripist just for me I want to feel better so bad I hope it works. Thanks i'll keep you updated hugs

I have been struggling with depression (and apparently anxiety) for just about 20 years now and I know I'm sick of it. You might want to seriously look for a therapist who can do what's called DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy). It apparently works to change your negative thought patterns. Also, you could try naturopathic options (St. John's Wort, 5HTP are a couple) that wouldn't have you all "drugged" up. You should also try to pick out and meet three potential therapists initially and ask for an introductory first visit so that you can see if you connect with them. Try to be sure they fit your style. For a long time I had a therapist I really loved but even though I still think she's great we reached a point where I really wanted actions to take and homework to do and that just isn't her way so I need to find someone else now. And I reiterate what others have said... as much as I want to kick my depression into another realm and never have to deal with it again, it keeps coming back to remind me that I just don't get to ignore it. Good luck.

I understand the wish for not wanting to take meds. Yes, there are different answers to the same questions and situations but I have to agree with Isadora, there is no one magic formula, but there are methods and meds that work for a lot of people. Continue your quest and hopefully you will find out sometimes what we wish for and what we get are very different and that can be depressing.

I too, have the wish to not have to take medication for depression. Unfortunately, I have to admit I am definitely better when I am taking it. Does just any med work? NO. What works for some doesn't for others. If you think you are getting weaker and weaker, perhaps now is the time to invest some energy in looking at the ways that you wish you didn't have to look at. It's going to take some time. It doesn't just go away. It may take a rest or a break but it comes back.

I sympathize with your pain and am so glad that after years of "dealing with it" I have found what works for me. What certainly didn't or doesn't work is to have someone else TELL me what to do.

I have also learned that I had to realize that some things are out of my control--which was a very hard thing to accept. I'd like to think I am superman and nothing can dent my exterior, much less my interior. But, I am not superman and I finally came to the conclusion that Superman doesn't exist.

You're already on a positive path to seeking out what works for others and maybe you'll find something that works for you. I think that discussing possibilities with others in a forum like this, reading how others deal with or don't deal with their depression is going to be helpful in some way. You're not alone. Hang in there.