Hi. I'm new to TBD,would like to say you're not alone. Both my sister and ex-girlfriend were told by doctors they were too young to go through menopause[early forties].My ex had most of the same symptoms as you,except that she got into the habit of LIVING in bars.The lack of sex,the loss of sleep because of her tossing,turning, kicking I could handle,but our communication became so strained,it just wasn't livable for either of us. Now her usual day is work from 10-2,then go to the bar from 2-10. Yes,menopause needs to be studied a lot more by scientists and doctors,maybe some foundation needs to be started,like they have for cancer,and so many other illnesses.This is a serious problem that ruins lives.It's a shame when a womans friends can diagnose her symptoms better than her doctor.[sorry to be so negative,but thats what I'm feeling about this whole mess. Hang in there,are there any drugs on the market that help at all? I know my GF never found any.

Oh I should add,that on the other hand my sister has gotten past this,she's now 50 years young,still happily married,and seems to be having the best time of her life in the past few years!!!

There are many treatments that can help, from natural remedies and herbs to bio-identical hormones to the estring, so the answer to your question is that they have. There are lots of options.

I highly recommend Christine Northup's book, The Wisdom of Menopause, to review what's available.

http://www.drnorthrup.com/bookstore/northrup_products.php?product_id=198

Hi tabaholic, my heart goes out to you as you struggle in your life. There is no firm age as to 'when' menopause starts. Women can be in their early 30's or late 40's, or older when they first start. I too, at 43 was told by two doctors that I was too young. Well, at 51, I've been post meno for almost 3 years.

First, the experts don't know your body as well as you do. Second, as Otter has said, there's a lot of information available on this stage of our lives. Along with the book she mentioned, another one that helped me was by Susun Weed, The Menopausal Years - she offers a lot of natural remedies as well.

Everyone experiences symptoms differently. My symptoms happened to be more annoying than anything. Until I read and researched information, I was in the dark because the females in my family just didn't talk about it.

I used quite a few things to help me with my symptoms.

Black cohosh; Evening Primrose Oil; multivitamin; sometimes Chinese herbs for acute symptoms.

I had other things in place before the symptoms really began:

massage; chiropractic; acupuncture; journaling; relaxation techniques.

The one suggestion that my doctor had did actually work. I suffered from sore breasts, she suggested eliminating caffeine. So I switched to decaf coffee - and gave up chocolate. I do eat chocolate now, but only maybe once a month. Eliminating simple sugars (white products) helps too.

I don't think there's one thing that covers all the symptoms - it's more like life style changes.

I learned to stay focused on what was in front of me; mind my business; say no to things I knew wouldn't be good for me; gentle and patient with myself.

For me it is and was a time of redefining - releasing - rejuvenation.

Have you had a chance to read the other discussions in the group? Another point I would like to make too is although each of us has our own experience(s) - we are here to support one another.

Hi Bob, welcome to tbd and thanks for posting. I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I totally agree with you about the medical profession getting more on board about menopause. My hubby - 24 years now - was absolutely wonderful - not only supportive as I struggled, but he shared what he was experiencing from the male perspective.

Okay, enough of my chattering,

Take care, Deb

bob why you in a group about menopause for women?? hmmmm

Wow, I do feel your pain but not near as much & I know that's it's because we all go through it differently. My first suggestion is change docs as fast as possible, maybe have to do so more than once until you get real results. Results are out there. The title here THE JOYS & ADVENTURES of MENOPAUSE? I think not!

I was told that I would go to post meno after my hyst, but that was wrong as well. That was when I was 41 & already having the systems. The surgery was due to cancer BUT I am okay, they found it all & I'm 60 now. But trust me when I say the damn docs do not know it all.

My Hubby was a true soldier through it all, but I have to confess that I was the one who was sexual. Serioulsy, My sexual drive increased, not decreased. Of course he wasnt' arguing with that....but the pain that I had been living with was gone after the surgery. They took everything! That & not having to deal with a period was marvelous....but yeah I still had those times when it was best to stay away from me.

I was on estrgen, the patch & most recently Estrace cream. Nothing really worked, but I really dont' think that all of it really ever ends. My Hubby sums it up with the family like this "we wake up & the decision for the day living with your mother is simple, you can chose to live or die, your choice she will grant either, no prob." HAHAHAHA!!

Our daughter did come home to visit for 2-years & our son only stays for the day & go home. LOL!!

But on the serious side, I have felt stronger & bettter in the last 20-years than ever before until diagonised with Diabetes 2-years ago. Still all in all, I'm good to go.

It's all up to you. You have to find your own way & you will.

good Luch & God's speed.

ps:Agree with Shari~Why is Bob here? HHuuummm, well he is new.

WOW! Should I be scared......

I now read all I can on menapause.

I suffer from occasional night sweats. The biggest problem is I suddenly have no patience. I seem to just get so angry for no real reason. Hubby is great, understanding and sympathetic.

We do laugh more about this than ever.....

Thank God for good humor!

Glad to see some male interest ! Tabaholic, I hope you can find a way to deal with it all. I know how hard it is. Some suffer so much more than others.

Great to have TBD to vent ! Hang in there :)