Thought I'd ask since you're new. Are you looking for literary critique on this, or is it posted for general reading? Contributors sometimes hold back here until they know what the poster is after.

sorry! Yes; am new here. Looked a little like an open forum.

It is an open forum. Where's the piece gone?

all I can say is, it's brief in the extreme. Somehow I missed the sense of building crescedo, and the punch line eludes me. If you entered something a bit more lengthy, we would not mind. Hope to see you again, Poet Girl. Don't be shy.

thank You for your graciousness, Westerly! That was even briefer than one of William Carlos William's poems, eh?:) I had posted something that was really of a personal nature.