And what do you gain by not believing him? He has confessed, he's showing you by word and deed that he's sorry. Why not give him the benefit of the doubt? Also why not work on repairing the distance in your marriage that allowed it to happen. Have a date night. Find new things to do together. Talk more. Build a stronger than ever connection.

I have trouble with you saying that he stills talk to her on the phone I really hate to ask you this BUT ARE YOU CRAZY? whew I had to say that, He really has to cut all tides and I do mean all tides with her in order to MOVE ON AND END THAT AFFAIR if not than its not going anywhere at all if he stills has even the littlest chance with keeping in touch with her, and even after a while you have to have his trust and attention in all ways good luck to ya. This is going to get real ruff for you put hang in their things will get better.

By an emotional affair are we talking a sexually based affair or just two people getting emotionally involved at work.If he is screwing her cut him loose. If he is playing high school "I love you the skys are blue " sophomoric crap tell him to stop chatting with her on the phone, stop hanging around with her at work and to come to his senses. If he gets angry and comes back at you with some off the wall crap like" you dont understand we only talk(sure you do!) then kick him to the curb.

He was having inappropriate conversations before and now they are not. yeah sure. the difference is probably from "God I want to screw your brains out!!!" to "Hypothetically if you and I were to get in bed together and do the things we used to talk about wouldnt it be fun!"

As an old player and someone who has been inand out of trouble more then once, let me tell you a secret, telling the truth about something that is not as bad as something you really also did that is worse is a move I have used myself. Usually where there is smoke there is fire.

To everyone who is saying that he should quit talking to her and cut all ties.

O.K.

They work together. They may need to communicate in order to work together, so are you suggesting that Cheryl Ann's husband quit his job?

That may or may not be possible. If it is not possible then insisting he not have contact with a co-worker is not helping matters.

Cheryl Ann, you should believe and trust your husband. Not doing so is only going to drive you further apart.

Check out www.marraigebuilders.com. It saved my marraige.

I can relate, from being on both sides of the fence. I agree, that ALL ties have to be cut. Work related discussions at work ONLY. At that point, you will probably be more comfortable taking him at his word. One word of advice: If he didn't sleep with her, please do not make him wish he had by constantly dogging or nagging about it. Short "digs" are never helpful and are very hurtful. He may start to feel like for all the grief he's suffering, he might as well have done the deed.

Been through it - still working at it after nearly 10 years.