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Group admin:: ladytexianmw
Created:: January 11, 2008
: 184 Members

Group Tags:

Infidelity, cheating, adultery, relationships, marriage, monogomy, affair, mental health, sex

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wounds still fresh!

Posted: Mar 24, 08 10:49am

Hi, I just need other opinions on how to handle the trust issue after my husband was emtionally involved with a friend of his. We both knew her and she had a past history of involving herself with married men during vulnerable times which we had. We've been married18 yrs. and never had to worry about trusting him. It's still fresh to me; it's only been a month since they cut all ties of friendship and had no communication. It was short lived anyway but still I'm not sure if I can trust either of them when I'm out of town on my daughters school field trip. We will be gone wed.-fri. this week and I am feeling we are in a very vulnerable stage in our relationship. We are getting along and we're enjoying each other kind of like when we first met. But I don't know if this is a good time to be away. Pleae anyone, let me know if this is normal or am I being paranoid?

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trust, infidelity, marriage, relationships, emotions

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2 Comments // 3 Members

TaliaHoffman

Posted: Mar 25, 08 12:15pm

Alicat wrote:

Hi, I just need other opinions on how to handle the trust issue after my husband was emtionally involved with a friend o...

Trust can be a fragile thing. Once it gets broken, it is very hard to repair. I don't think you're being paranoid.

Take heart in the fact that your husband has broken off all relationship with this woman. It seems he is really trying to rebuild your marriage.

Talk to him (don't whine at him) about how you're feeling. Wonder out loud if there's something he could do while you're away that could help you feel OK about things. Maybe call each other frequently, maybe knowing what his plans are for while you're away, maybe something else that you two can think of.

Go on the field trip - don't make your daughter suffer because of this. Besides, you have to start living your regular life sometime.

Good luck rebuilding the trust - it is hard to do - but once done, might be worth all the trouble.

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DebbieFratt

Posted: Mar 26, 08 5:55pm

TaliaHoffman wrote:

Trust can be a fragile thing. Once it gets broken, it is very hard to repair. I don't think you're being paranoid.

...

The hardest thing I had to do was to let my husband go away over-night with my son 2 days after I found out about his affair. I was devestated. Totally convinced that the trip was a "set-up" even though I knew better. Truth is, I needed him to be away. I needed the time alone to re-evaluate things. While he was away with my son, I was home with my daughter. She forced me to do the "girl" things that I wasnt in the mood to do. We had a wonderful time. The trust will come, but dont deny your daughter because of what your husband did.

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