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Group admin:: Erica
Created:: August 2, 2007
: 2805 Members

Group Tags:

relationships, sex, Sex Over 40

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Can YOU make love to someone you are not in love with??

Posted: Jun 30, 08 6:52pm

I posted a similar thread in another public forum and it caused quite the debate, so I thought I would pose the question to you good folks.

Can you make love to someone you are not in love with?

I believe I can.... now, this does not mean I believe everyone is able to. Also, please note that I have said "make love *to*" not "make love *with*"..... for me there is a difference.

I can make passionate love to someone I care for.... with all the sentiment and compassion that I have to give to someone. One minute we may be engaged in the animalistic urges that take over our bodies and the next minute making love to that person while our eyes and bodies are locked in erotic bliss.

I know that to some people if they are not in love, then it is just sex and of course, that is just fine... to each their own... but for me it is much more than that.... it is a sharing of each other whether or not we are *in love* with each other..... and yet, other times it is pure greediness as all I want is gratification from the man that I am having sex with.... those are the times I'm not making love... I'm just fucking him.

Of course, making love and fucking when you are in love is the absolute best, I will not dispute that, but I can give just as deeply when I'm not *in love*. How 'bout you?

Tags:

Sex Over 40, sex, Relationships

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32 Comments // 29 Members

IsadoraAlman

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:12pm

yes.

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Pattygirl

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:13pm

sure can!

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mellymel

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:24pm

Hmmmm.....tough question. Depends on how you define "love". For me if I'm not "in" love or simply "love" the person then it's just sex, a fuck.

Make love "to" and make love "with" means the same thing to me. Making love "to" I'm giving of myself without the other person giving of himself. Making love "with" we are both giving of ourselves to each other.

Make sense?? Hell..........what a tough one!!!

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paul58

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:40pm

One man's view here - technically & physically speaking, yes, making love requires being with someone I like and feel very comfortable with. Fully giving of myself and expecting full trust and openness in a relationship in return - truly making love together - requires time, connection, emotional vulnerability. The physical can be had, the emotional connection that evokes "making love together" is another level altogether. Ladies, am I too old fashioned? I agree with Mellymel.

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Nick_Danger

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:45pm

Not only "yes" but "hell, yes!"

To quote Tina Turner, "What's love got to do with it?"

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Colette1961

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:46pm

I totally agree with myself when saying your question would have to do with just how much I would be tendered for such services. Just in Jest.

My totally realistic answer would be...Been there, didn't love, but made love and remembering it was an unpleasant experience...Thank God, for my Husband, of 26 years, and may I never have to have that feeling again.

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bob dell

Posted: Jun 30, 08 7:48pm

Yes.The best sex I ever had was with a girl that I didn't 'love'-not in the way that I think you mean love. It's a long story,but we got together at just the right time,[after divorces]we both needed some attention,and it was great,and we both agreed "no strings attached" I still think about her quite often,even though the sex was ALL we had in common-and somehow I know she still thinks about me,even though she's 2000 miles away.

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