When a post has an offensive headline (in the case I deleted it included the word "fucking" and a vulgar analogy) our members and visitors are not given a choice of whether to read it or not. So we give greater latitude to the use of obscenities in context. I will quote from our Community Guidelines (which you might want to read): While we are devoted to free speech, we reserve the right to remove posts that do not respect these guidelines or that detract significantly from our users' experience on the site.

And I have no concern about being sued when a member is offensive, please don't put words in my mouth.

Having divorced two lawyers, I guarantee you I don't have more power than the courts.

Robin I thank you for being the first to respond and I can appreciate both the difficulty of your position and your “personal opinion.”

As stated, I never saw the thread and don't care what it said, although you have given me some idea. Having some knowledge now of what was said, I'm probably not nearly as outraged as you and some others. I come from a construction environment and almost as good as truck drivers, when I comes to expressing ourselves. I do agree however that it was inappropriate way to express themselves on this forum.

Having been divorced from two lawyers I would guess you could have responded in a manor this gentleman could have appreciated. I know I could have and obviously I choose to express myself in ways less extreme.

I respect the fact that you leave this thread here. I cannot agree, that you, or anyone else has the right to censor anyone. If your going to leave this thread, I am looking forward to other responses.

To be honest with you part of me agrees with what you did and all of me agrees that jerks like that disgust me. Problem is most of me knows that once you make a small decision like that, then its easier to make another until the line is blurred as to whether the people or the person in control is being served.

Freedom is not freedom for some, or freedom for whats acceptable. Its also “not” freedom to abuse someone else. I like what you did Robin, I can't condone your right to do it. It gives you the power to shift the line where ever you like and no one should have that power. TV, Radio, Newspapers, etc. are all being controlled one way or another. I'm asking you not to be a party to controlling the only public media that is not regulated, the Internet. Especially to censer someone because they are stupid enough, not to realize how offensive he is and what a jerk he is making of himself. There are no kids here

However this works out, I don't envy the responsibility you have. I'm just keeping you honest and I resent the fact that you have to power to stop me if you choose. So far I respect the fact that you haven't stopped me.

I'm done, does anyone else have an opinion?

If that expression was used, I am pleased to see it removed.

If people can't express themselves without resorting to these words then, in my opinion, they are not worth listening to.

To me - and I can only speak for myself - the word "fucking" is probably just about acceptable in context, but certainly not in a topic heading.

Personally, I don't like the word - no matter what connoctation in which it is used - and I see no legitimate reason for the use of it on TBD.

I personally applaud the removal of some threads that I see here. I am all for freedom of expression. That doesn't mean that every expression is appropriate in every venue.

If this were a government-funded site, you'd have more grounds for complaining about freedom of speech being impinged on. As it is, this ia a social networking site. It has terms of service. And when someone violates those terms of service, there are consequences.

If you want something more freewheeling than this, if you truly are concerned about censorship, you can certainly look for a different site. I choose this one.

Rock on, Robin. I trust you and I love this site.

Jerr,I appreciate where you are coming from. Freedom of speech is something we should fight to the death for. However intelligent adults are not reduced to 4 letter words to express themselves. I could compete with the best long shore men when it comes to cussing, I chose not to any more than I chose to hang out in redneck or biker bars. I get what I expect from TBD, aclean adult chat site. I tend to be very protective of it's content and members. This is MY place and I don't need to see filth in my face . We're not a closed club, but everyone is not welcome. The only real requirement here is that you be nice. We don't need to get down and dirty to get our thoughts out. It really takes a lot to be thrown off TBD. ( have you checked out the LOL Lounge ! ) You won't find any prudes here. We're normal people that expect the bounds of common courtesy to be adheared to. It would take the out cry of many, AND the review of the administrators for someone to be ejected. Some of us may be a little perverted and almost no subject is taboo, but there are lines that should not be crossed. We are afun loving group, but we do try not to be offensive. I appreciated that the administrators are willing to listen and act upon complaints of this sort. This is the BEST site for over 40's on the net. I'm where I want to be. I'm comfortable here. Stick around Jerr, I'm sure you'll agree. We have some great debates I'm sure you'll enjoy. You wanted opinions. This is mine.

If one feels there is the need for colorful metaphors in postings or replies they can be replaced with much less offensive words such as "flipping" or "effen" are ones i have seen, something like that...While my ears are not stranger to bad language (construction also) it dont feel it has a place here..

The issue is far more than a possibility of a lawsuit. It wasn't the use of the word f--k--g that was so offensive, it was the context in which that poster used it. I am known for occasionally throwing a bomb into a post ... when it is for fun or when it is the way I would say it in the real world. When I am here, I am not talking to my granddaughter, who as a professional rock musician has heard every word in the book of curses but never uses them herself ... except once and the story is so funny that I have to tell it.

When my granddaughter was six and we (including her great grandmother who was eighty-seven at the time) were visiting her in Seattle where she lived at that time, we decided to go to the zoo. After a few hours of walking, I said that I couldn't go on any longer - I had an impairment of mobility.

Rachel, who wanted to visit the monkeys - a long, hilly climb away, put her hands on her hips and said, "Well fuck me!"

My mom - her great grandmother -asked, "Rachel, where did you learn language like that?"

Rachel said, "Mommy says it all the time!"

I thought my daughter-in-law would dig herself a hole and jump in! Her denial is, to this day, taken with a large grain of salt!

I have never before or since heard Rachel use any word I would be ashamed for anyone to hear. Her language is without flaw despite the fact that she has performed on the same bill with Joan Rivers whose mouth on stage is like an open sewer and she has shared the green room with rockers whose only noun, verb and adjective begins with F. Some of them even use the adverb form!

So, it isn't the words; it is the context and the intent.

Another secret from my family. When I wrote a textbook about addictions treatment many years ago, I had an inside joke. I guaranteed that I would use every one of the seven words that will presently get censored on TV. I pulled it off in dialogue without the publisher making a single squeak. I could have bowdlerized what real people said. I chose to throw the impact at the students because they were going to hear worse when they got out into the field. But aside from the verisimilitude i provided, there was the inside joke that I did it with the intent to get away with it. I don't think many textbooks - especially award-winning ones pulled that off. But that is me. If I can't have something secret to smile about what's the use of getting up in the morning? If I adhere to any rules it is the rule of WYSIWYG: what you see is what you get. And for those whose sensitivities I offend, oh well, if that is the worst that happens in your life, thank God or whatever you worship because you are the second luckiest person on earth. The last time I checked, the luckiest was Lou Gehrig - at least in the movie version of his life that I saw with Gary Cooper.