I feel really bad for adults who never had the family life I had, and still have today. For fathers day, invited my parents and I for dinner. She made T-bone steaks, chicken breasts, and lobster tails! She really made my dads day complete! My sister and I are both thankful for the childhood and teenage years with a very close family support system, which to this day has never changed, i think it just got stronger! Both my parents were involved in raising all 4 of us. I have 2 brothers also. We always did things as a family, and there was so much love it was just awesome!! Both my parents deserve a metal for the way they raised us!

sfco@ptd.net

My parents were married in 1952, and have been together ever since. I can't say my childhood was awful, but I can say that I don't have a whole lot in common with my dad. He's an intellectual, has a PHD and is an ordained Methodist Minister. He enjoys theater and symphonic music. I, on the other hand am very athletic. During my school days I felt very alienated from my parents. As a four sport letter winner in High School I was involved in Cross Country, Wrestling, Track and Baseball. I could probably count on both hand how many events they addended in 4 years. However, my Senior year when I didn't wrestle and was in a school play they made absolutely sure to be at my opening night. Figures that my younger sister eschewed sports for acting in order to get attention from our parents.

This father's day is hard for me. My dad made a lot of mistakes but now that he is dying it seems insignificant. He wasn't really there for us but I forgive him.

My Dad had terminal cancer when I was 9 yrs. old & returned to WV to be taken care of by his family. He died a few years later. We spent summers with him, he wasn't the father of the year... just Dad. Fortunately, we have 2 opportunities in life for that parent/child relationship. Us as children, us as parents.

I had a father of another family who watched over me as a teen, it made a difference in my life to have that influence. Now, as a Mother, I encourage my husband to interact with our children... it doesn't come easy for him. But he does try.

My dad was not in my life much until I was in my twenties. I blamed him the entire time, and of course it was hurtful. I finally found out that he had tried to see us, but my mother was spiteful and wouldn't let him. Like you, I got over the hurt as an adult but still had a few moments I felt resentful.

About five years ago he got lung cancer, and died three months later. We had a very touching conversation the last time I saw him. His last words to me were "God Bless you, sweetheart". I'm glad we made things better before he died.

My Dad is Great, He's always been there for me. Ever tho he is dying with heart failer. He one GREAT man... He and Mom have been marryed 52 yrs. Love him very much...

Hi Disenchanted,

I can relate to your situation. I also have no relationship with my father. I had to break ties with him about 6 years ago. And before that it was, shall we say, less than good. All that said, my faith has seen me through this and to the other side. Are there times when I'm sad? Yes, but less frequently now. And good has come from the lessons I've learned. Just like the individual who had a good upbringing takes away things that they want to imitate with their own family, I've learned things I don't want to do in my family life and I've tried to incorporate those to the best of my ability.

I hope you will find encouragement,

Shelley