I can totally understand the depression and all, it sucks...plain and simple. One thing.... don't think that everyone that is bi-polar is a messed up drama queen! I am bi-polar and about the most chill person known! The dating thing throws me too, but for women it's a little different, we can get "the label"! Good luck and keep rambling... it's good for the soul!

David, I'm sorry you're in the shit, it's no fun.

The best I can tell you is never let go of hope. You're going to live in Suck Town for a while, but you'll be okay.

Please give yourself permission to hurt, to grieve. Don't blame anyone, just feel what you feel for as long as you need to.

It sounds "touchy-feely" but it's true. If you want to come through this clean, this works.

Check the web or your local newspaper for a divorce recovery group or workshop in your area. If you and your ex ever went to counseling, ask the counselor for any recommendations to such a group if you don't find anything in the paper or the web.

To be honest, my advice to you is put a stop to dating if you're fresh from the divorce and are wounded--which it sounds like you are. Dating can be incredibly stressful and that's the last thing you need right now.

Give some time to yourself. Go on a vacation to somewhere you've never been, even if it's just a weekend. The important thing: Break out of your environment.

Reach out to your friends if they'll respond. You never know who will come through for you when you'd thought they couldn't or wouldn't.

Very well written Ken and very true...

peace be upon you, pasolover

i am not putting a label on bipolar

it is the situation/condition that contributed to my divorice.all in all my ex is very beautiful person she just didn't and refused to get treatment.i thank you for your comments and value them.

personally i am quite understanding of bipolar and did my best to help my ex to cope with it she had her moments. i could go on but thanks again

david

peace be with you always ken

i have gave thought to your comments and will work on them i strongly agree on the dating comment cause in a sense i have found its all about self in the name of love its quite amusing but it can be stressful.everyone is so demanding really wanting to take care of that ache in side that is calling and them blame you if you don't want to take care of it. and i you wanted to do is be a friend lol lol lol lol

the vacation part i can do just need to free up some money and time. ken this advice will help me so much and i will put it to use all in all its going to take time

with websites like this i do believe i will pull through

in peace i remain

david

David, everything will be fine. I have had many losses in my life! I have been through a divorce also. I was a mess but I survived and so will you! Cheer up nothing stays bad forever, not even the darkest day!

Hi david c,

At this moment in time, I'm not where you are, feeling alone and hurting, but tomorrow I might be. I've been there before, and I think it's part of being human. I really don't think anyone gets through life w/o a few battle scars. In other words, you are in good company even when you feel so alone. You made a fantastic leap of health for yourself by sharing right here.

I'm probably being terminally naive about disclosing stuff about me here, but just bear with me... I divorced a psychological & financial abuser about 10 yrs ago, raised two kids mostly on my own, survived cancer, and now I've been unemployed for the 1st time in my life & can't seem to find a job. I chose to live where I have no family to rely on.

I haven't been through half of what others deal with. I do get depressed, down on myself, etc. I have found it's good to surround myself with people who encourage/not feel sorry for me. Optimistic people. Then, I give myself permission to treat myself well. I finally bought a guitar, and I plan to give it my best shot to learn enough to make me feel good playing it. If I find I don't like it, I'll sell it and move on.

I find it helpful to get rid of the dead weight, clutter, and negative whatever in my life. It drags me down. Everyone has their own way of coping. I want to emerge a better person and maybe help another along the way.

I hope some of this will be helpful for you. Wishing you the best...

Lori