snoopy63. Happy Belated Birthday ! Been there, had that done to me. I think the only question you have to ask you self at this point, is if you're better off with him or without him. Obviously your needs are not being met.We all want to be nice and do ' the right thing'. It should be a two way street. If it isn't, you might be going in the wrong direction. You may want to consider the possibility that it's time to move on. You always have a choice. Stay and suck it up, ( and be miserable ) or find someone who at least thinks the day you were born is important. You are not making a big deal of nothing. I feel the same way about Bd's. I'd like to know that my mate is glad I was born and will take the time to show it. It only happens once a year and they have plenty of time to plan. If this is your only problem with your SO, then, yes, bring it up. My SO was the same way and I did tell him how important it was to ME. Communication. No one's a mind reader.It helps to choose a partner who's faults we can live with. Talk. As far as commitment goes, has he ever bought a used car ? If he did, he bought someone elses problems, but they may not be his problems.

Janice,

Thanks for the Birthday Wish and thanks for the advice. I've been weighing pros and cons for some time. He's a good man and is responsible where he needs to be. We usually communicate well. With everything that has been going on in his life I feel like my making an issue of this is just plain selfish. I think at one point i told him i didn't want anything for my birthday. But come on.....men aren't that stupid! LOL

My excuse for him is that he is under a lot of stress right now. However.....i'm right by his side through everything too. We did go out for dinner on my birthday and he said he did plan on getting a cake and all but the day got so busy.....not really an excuse i know.

I want to bring it up to him, how hurt i feel, but i don't know how and i'm sure i'll be put on the defensive when i do bring it up.

snoopy63,if you do not bring it up to him it will continue to eat at you ! This is important to YOU.If you are put on the defensive, then you really need to examine the reason you continue to stay in this relationdhip. No one should be made to feel bad because they are expressing their personal desires. That's kind of selfish isn't it ? Yes, we do make excuses for those we care about, but how far and how long are you willing to do this while not having your feelings considered ? There are lots of good men out there.Remember hon, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astair did and she did it backwards and with highheels on ! Give your self some credit !

Each of us has things that are important to us that may or may not be important to others. The issue is that that special person in your life needs to be considerate of what is important to you. None of us is perfect, but if you've been together for a while and he knows that you like a big deal made over your birthday, then he should have at least apologized if life was too crazy for him to make enough of a fuss.

Before you decide to leave or to just suck it up, I'd suggest a clear and direct conversation with him about how hurt you are. Just ignoring his birthday makes you as bad as he is. Once you start playing tit for tat, it is very hard to stop it. (Just ask the Hatfields and the McCoys.) Go the direct route and see what he says/does.

And BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I hope the next one is more what you want.

Thanks for the responses. I would never just ignore his birthday, its not in me. i don't believe in those games, hate them actually. Communication is the key. And you're right. If he sloughs it off then maybe he's not who i thought he was.

Snoopy,

You can't extol the virtues of good communication on one hand, tell your guy (even in jest) that you don't want anything for your birthday, and then be hurt when that's what you get. Speak up!

Happy Belated birthday Snoopy. What about both of you cooking something special for each other? Something new on each other's birthday. A nice candlelit dinner at home. We do this. Turn off the lights and light the candles, put on soft music.

Sit down with him and tell him how you feel. If he avoids the conversation then that possibly means he is not ready for a relationship yet. Good luck to you.