I would get that my marriage and/or my husband's mental health, probably both, were in trouble. I would ask him what he wanted, what the reason for this statement was, and hear him out. Then I'd propose counseling - for him and/or for the two of you.

I'm with Isadora.

Thanks for getting back with me.

I had mentioned that and he said nothing would help. He wanted to continue with me and be like roommates - NOT. This all happened the week that we had already made reservations to go away for our 9th anniversary and rented a car etc. He stayed another 5 days before moving out and was cold as ice. He slept on the couch and knocked on my head board to wake me up to take him to work - due to he doesnt have licenses. He didnt speak to me for the whole 45 min ride - then I cried all the way home 45 mins by myself. Every time I suggested some help he laughed and said oh no here we go again. He then called me from his job after he moved out and wished me an happy anniversary.....I even called him since he left (I actually took him with his belongings (what he wanted) to his mom's house(he packed not me). Since then I had to take some more things over there and he had a nerve to ask me didnt I want a hug? I said no...I have cried so many nights and days since he has been gone. He said he knows it would never be the same if we got back together. He's probably right - I have been really hurt over all of this. He claims now that he doesn't know what he is going through. Well I tried before he left to get help for him or us or whatever.

Altima37

Thanks but read my reply to Isadora.

Thanks

Altima37

It sounds like your husband does, indeed, have some psychological problems. Unfortunately, you're getting caught in their wake.

If you can gain no further understanding from him as to why this sudden breakup, counseling will help you weather it with fewer tears.

Isadora and Michael give great advice to go for counseling. If he won't go with you, go alone. This is a really hard time for you and there is no reason to go it alone. A good counselor can help you figure out how to set boundaries with your husband and how to move on with your life. It won't be easy, no matter what you do, but a good support system that includes good friends and a good therapist, will help lots.

Errrr sorry -- but that sounds a stereotypical councellers reply -- why is it he that could be wrong -- why DID he SAY that --- do you have to be a mental case to say things that might not be liked by the recieving party-- why the heck should they want counselling --are they not big enough to sort their own problems out ---or are counsellers the be all and end all of problems ---- or are they just self opinionated people that like to think they can answer life's problem at the drop a hat ( plus the counselling fee)