Groups > Sexless Marriages

Join Group

Group admin:: myagewriter
Created:: September 28, 2007
: 760 Members

Group Tags:

sexless marriage, sex, desire differences

Member Kudos

Helpful (934)
Funny (232)
Inspirational (378)

Discussion Board > View Discussion

to start a discussion

Help im going crazy

Posted: Jul 9, 08 11:11am

I have a very high or maybe its normal sex drive. My wife has a very low one. Been married 3 years now and we average sex once a month.

She doesnt touch(you know what i mean) she doesnt like kissing, she doesnt caress much, the only comfortable position for her is missionary, once a month if that.

Last 3 weeks we have been sleeping in separate rooms and I dont miss her. We are also not talking. I try to do everything i can to make her happy. I do laundry, ill cook, ill clean up etc.So she cant have the excuse that its chores at home etc. I suggest we go see a doctor cause sometimes low libido can be handled with medication and she took this as an insult. We argued and she left the room and since that day we havent spoken or slept in the same room( its been 3 weeks). Funny thing is I dont feel the urge to talk to her, or go the room she is sleeping in at night to just hold her etc. Im quite comfortable sleeping alone and not even talking to her for days on end and that is quite scary dont you think!!!!!!!!!!

Tags:

marriage, sex, Relationships

Give kudos

EMAIL THIS

8 Comments // 8 Members

IsadoraAlman

Posted: Jul 9, 08 12:58pm

There are people who go on the way you describe for years. You have only to read some of the TBD posts on sexless marriages and desire discrepancy. Have a long talk with yourself, Georgia5. If you really don't want this to go on indefinitely fix it NOW. Insist on marriage counseling, whether or not she's insulted. Beg, bribe, browbeat, but get into therapy. Otherwise, I'd start planning your exit strategy from a dead marriage or resign yourself to living as silent roommates.

Give kudos

bella

Posted: Jul 9, 08 3:14pm

Thats what happens when your being deprived, Each time you get rejected is an insult, lowers your self esteem, makes you feel unloved and it hurts..so that I think builds anger and resentment, for me thats how I feel anyays.

Give kudos

JohnBGoodenough

Posted: Jul 9, 08 7:00pm

To bella, and don't forget pressure. We are all sexual beings, it's in our nature and when nature is being put aside it tend to revolt. IE global warming Anyway, no real answer from me but I know what you mean. The resentment of being unanswered expectations.

Give kudos

boothby171

Posted: Jul 9, 08 7:52pm

Georgia5,

Except for the fact that you two are married, it really doesn't sound like you two are married.

If your wife is unwilling to change, then things won't change. If you can live with this situation for the rest of your life (and why the hell would you want to do that?) then by all means do absolutely nothing.

Give kudos

bella

Posted: Jul 9, 08 9:09pm

I agree with you boothby171 if one is not willing to change, and the other partner is unhappy, whats the point of being together???? Why would someone want to be unhappy..its a waste of time. Just think Goergia5..there is someone out there that is compatible to you, someone who will make you smile again..and make you feel whole. Thats just my opinion.

Give kudos

MichaelCastleman

Posted: Jul 9, 08 9:47pm

I'm with Isadora. If you do nothing, things will probably stay about the same. If you want a different marriage, you have to take clear steps to make that happen. I'd suggest starting with marriage counseling. If she won't go, I urge you to go solo. You need to vent, and a therapist may help you develop better coping skills, or counsel you on a graceful exit from this relationship.

Give kudos

chloemoon

Posted: Jul 14, 08 1:06pm

I feel you georgia5. I'm in a similar predicament. My post is in the "Lonely" discussion.I hope it gets better for you.

Give kudos