My husband thinks masturbating in front of him is disgusting. So it is alone when it has been weeks and I can't even sleep. It makes me very, very, very sad. And feel ugly and unwanted.

When I was married, I loved to watch my wife masturbate, we both did, it seemed to bring us closer knowing we both was satified. Now being divorced, I still think of her and her HIGH points!

You will never get “too good” at masturbating. You will never exceed your limit. It will increase your ability to orgasm with your lover, no matter how many times you come alone. You will not be stigmatized if the world ever finds out. You will not get so addicted that you lock yourself in your room and never come out.

You will, though, learn to feel better about yourself. You’ll be better at managing your stress. You’ll be more confident when you’re displaying affection for your lover. You’ll develop curiousity about more sexual experiences. You will have a more open mind.

This lack of support, in the media or otherwise, for the notion of a masterbation .. pleasing oneself is one of the last major hurdles we, as a sex, must overcome. It is time we demand what we deserve ~ a sense of self, and a sense of satisfaction.

It’s a sad thing that we’re taught, as a culture, that happiness comes from the people around us. It can’t. We can’t wait for others to enrich our lives. We can’t hope that the things they do or say will contribute to who we are to become. We must achieve that on our own, and if masturbation is a tool towards that, then I’m all about me.

As a society here in America, we’re suffering from an all-time high touch-deficit. Meaning, more people than ever before go for days, weeks, months, and sometimes years without touching another person , be it a pat on the shoulder or a kiss on the lips. We’re so deprived already, that the notion of not allowing yourself to be personally pleasured through masturbation is nearly cruel and inhumane, and self-inflicted, at that. No one deserves to be alone, and no one should have to live without having that feeling of coming alive through an orgasm.

It’s not dirty, or shameful, or sinful. It’s a beautiful, empowering act. And sometimes, it’s just a damned nice thing to experience.

Take back control of your sexuality. Learn about yourself. Live a little. Ditch the shame. Embrace your femininity. Push the magic button that’ll change everything you feel about yourself. Strong, sexy, confident, and self-aware is what 'we' are needing desperately!!

And, to answer ..

My husband has been sexless with me for close to 7 months, he denies masterbating and in his beliefs, it's unattractive and a turn off. Whether or not he realizes it or not .. He's dead wrong!

And, as a matter of fact .. I continue on doing what I do best.

Happy Day .. Peeple!

Jade

Does my spouse know I masturbate? Yes, just like I know he also masturbates.

Do I masturbate in front of him? I don't hide it, but I don't go out of my way to make him 'catch' me.

Yes I have 'special fantasies'. Don't we all?

I do not consider either phone or cyber to be cheating. I haven't done it often (only one real cyber partner), but he has walked in on me while I was cybering and he just excused himself and left the room, so he doesn't consider it cheating either. (I asked)

According to my husband if I'm not having orgasms on a regular basis I masturbate in my sleep.

Jill, I understand how you feel.

Sometimes I am amazed at what comes out during an orgasm. The last time I masturbated I started crying and saying "It's been so long....It's been so long" right before I came.

There were so many degrees of sadness inside me at that point in time.

I don't know what else to say except I'm sorry that anyone else has to feel this way. If I could change one thing it would be that nobody (man or woman) ever had to feel sad, ugly and unwanted.

Married and partnered folks need to understand that "monogamy" == getting some.

Not having sex at all is called ABSTINENCE and it doesn't sound like you signed up for that--especially not with the lame blame game excuse that you are not attractive, which you are.

Sex and intimacy with you is basically a 'use it or lose it' thing. Otherwise he is just trying to enforce abstinence on you while trying to lower your self-esteem to the point where you are potentially less willing to feel entitled to passion...it's not right!!! I'm a 43 year old woman also and this is a SERIOUSLY horny time for me...I bet your body is yelling out for you to get your groove on as well.

I agree with functional on this one, you are not ugly and unattractive. We are always our own worst critics, we see something different in the mirror than what others see and no one can convince us otherwise.