I've BTDT with both my kids. Yes, their feelings were hurt, but I explained that not everyone can be invited to every party. That's a fact of life. I then pointed out to them that when we plan their parties we have to set a limit on guests. The same goes for other families. When my kids were younger I would plan a special outing or activity the day of the party. That way they felt better and in some cases GLAD they missed the party. LOL! I also make a point to mail invitations, as opposed to handing them out, in hopes of avoiding hurt feelings. It annoys me when people send invitations to school with their child. Then the kids see who did and did not get one.